Further Up and Further In

Bowties are cool.

2012-03-06T19:21:00.001-08:00

Today, my family decided to take a trip to the zoo. However, I was feeling entirely exhausted so I decided to opt out. Instead of going to gawk at animals, I stayed home and watched Star Trek with my dad.

Am I sounding like a nerd yet?

Don't worry, it gets better. Or worse -- whichever the case may be.

After Star Trek (Deep Space Nine), I decided to paint my nails. This is a rare occurrence, partly because I don't have the time and also because I dislike the smell (and, I should mention, my family dislikes it too). A couple of days ago I picked up some nail polish during my family's once-a-year trip to Target. Up until now I'd only owned nail polish in shades of pink and purple. However, my whim on this day was to select a lovely hue of sky blue and also a nice-looking shade of lime green.

Just so you all know, this lime green nail polish is a lot uglier than I thought it would be. It's going to have to grow on me.

(Side note: My eight-year-old sister, after seeing the nail polish, decided to purchase some too. It was only after she had selected several colors that we realized she'd selected red, orange, yellow, dark blue, and purple -- the perfect way to complete a rainbow. This was fortunate considering the fact that our existing nail polish bottles dried up years ago.)

So after I had painted all the fingers one one of my hands (and also tried to type with said hand, a venture which was somewhat successful), I decided to watch something. I briefly considered Star Trek, but decided I wanted to make a foray into a completely new show. The new show I selected just happened to be Doctor Who.

Many of my friends have told me about it, but it took me a long time to actually decide to watch the show. As it so happens with me, I already knew the names of all the characters and even some very strange plot twists. (I didn't mind reading spoilers since I figured I'd never watch the show. As it so happens, I was wrong.) Anyway, I clicked play on Season 5, episode 1 -- The Eleventh Hour. It's the beginning of the most recent incarnation of the Doctor, Matt Smith, who is my personal favorite. (Yes. I did have a favorite before I even watched the show. Oops.)

From the beginning, I had a strange fascination with the show. Okay, okay, at first I thought the beginning was weird -- but you can't deny that a blue police box careening out of control is a little strange. As the show progressed, there was barely a second where I was bored. (This is a major feat, considering I tend to zone out with anything of a televised nature.) Mediocre plots and obvious plot twists do not phase me. Well, they do phase me, but not for the good. To grab my attention, you must have an absolutely brilliant show.

I'm not 100% certain about the rest of the series, but the episode I watched was an absolutely brilliant show.

I think I'd watch it just on account of the dry, British humor. From the very beginning, I was laughing out loud. I had to keep a notepad open on my computer to scribble down random quotes that tickled my fancy. And for the entire opening of the show, I was so transfixed that I had to pause it to finish painting the nails on my other hand.

As for the rest of it, I'm a bit concerned that it may be too intense or creepy. (Even The Eleventh Hour was creepy, but the brilliance outweighed the bad, I think.) So I'll have to take it one episode at a time. But for an hour's worth of diversion, I think Doctor Who was worth it -- and far surpassed any expectations I ever had.

I once saw a lady with TARDIS earrings at a movie theater. I didn't understand what was so cool about them then. Now I do. The TARDIS is amazing. The end.

"I'm the Doctor. I'm worse than everybody's aunt." ~ The Doctor

"20 minutes to save the world, and I've got a post office. And it's shut!"
~ The Doctor

"Nurse-boy, give me your phone... Phone, now, gimme!" ~ The Doctor

"This is it, Jeff. Right here, right now. This is when you fly. Today's the day you save the world." ~ The Doctor

Jeff: "Why me?"

The Doctor: "It's your bedroom."

"You are not of this world." ~The Atraxi

"No, but I've put a lot of work into it." ~Doctor

"Bowties are cool." ~ The Doctor

Before the Novel

2012-03-01T15:33:00.000-08:00

I've been having a fair amount of difficulty writing lately. No... it isn't the writing part, exactly -- rather, it's the plotting that must happen before writing. I have trouble with this stage. Always. If you recall, I put up quite a few frenzied posts before NaNo last year, this being one of them. And once again, you, my blog readers, are the ones who get the front seat to my writing weaknesses. So be my guest -- get comfortable, grab a pillow and a cappuccino while we commiserate together.

I'm plotting for Camp NaNoWriMo. Tentatively. Because as we all know, I tend to have a hard time committing to writing challenges until they're almost upon me. (Even on November 1st I was completely unsure of whether I wanted to let NaNo devour my entire month. I succumbed, of course.) So, when I say that I'm plotting for Camp NaNo, take it with a grain of salt. Or a pound of salt. Whatever you wish.

Anyway, even if I don't do Camp NaNo, I've decided I'm going to write something this summer. What might that something happen to be, you ask? You know her well. Perhaps too well. Or perhaps not at all. Her name... is Avary. (The idea of her originated here, and subsequent posts about her can be found here.)

Yes. I've finally decided to write her story. I've wanted to write it for a long time, and even tried writing it multiple times. Now I'm taking the leap... and I've landed straight into a plothole. Lots of them. Plotholes are huge gaping crevices in the middle of the ground, filled with inky words and scattered ideas that somehow don't want to cooperate. Plotholes are my worst enemy (besides Sauron, but we didn't come to talk about my escapades in Middle Earth, did we?).

Anyway. Avary's story was born around two years ago on a dark and stormy night. (Just kidding. I have no idea what the weather was.) I had a dream about that reeked of sci-fi and fantasy, filled with time travel and a random dude named Brian who had lots of problems to juggle.

This story has gone through so many revisions. So many characters. Brian has now become Ryan, and I love him to pieces. And somehow, somewhere, Avary intruded on this mess of a novel inkling by quietly wiggling her way into my thoughts and ideas.

Now, however, my plot is a mess. It turns out that novels don't take kindly to you deleting entire characters. (Ha, yes, I deleted one. Violet. I don't regret it; she needed to leave.) I have several gaping plotholes, as I've mentioned before, and as soon as I figure out how to fix one, I'm faced with several others. One of the biggest ones is my characters (except Ryan, of course, who has been positively wonderful through this whole process). My current two-dimensional problems. Avary. Bailey. Sawyer. Their personalities are incredibly void, lacking life and vigor to make them whole people. Maybe it's because they're too perfect -- or, maybe, in Avary's case, they're too flawed. I don't know.

So here I am, once again in the place I was last October, trying to find a plot. Grasping for something -- anything to hold onto. And desperately hoping that my ideas aren't cliche, hoping that I'll find something positively brilliant that will shake the world to its core. (It probably doesn't help that I just finished The Hunger Games trilogy and I'm wondering how on earth I can write a masterpiece like that.) I'm also overusing semi-colons; I recently discovered how wonderful they are and they make me feel highly pretentious.

But I digress. Any advice would be welcomed. Or maybe just well-wishes and prayers. I've been here before, and I'll be back here again. It's the place where ideas collide and ink is poured and sweat stands out on my poor little forehead while my brain is sorely overworked. It's the place before the novel.

(And then we have the actual writing bit, which could be just as torturous, but I refuse to think about that.)

the 29th

2012-02-29T21:15:00.000-08:00

i feel like i should put something down to mark this day in history. the 29th. the first leap year that i remember, and the last leap year for four more years. for once, this year has 366 days instead of 365.

but you probably knew all this. so i just wanted to write my thoughts down for this day...

except i have no idea what i'm thinking. at all. i'm too tangled up in my thoughts. help! ;)

so, i will leave you with the hope of more coherent blog posts in the future. just take this post as evidence that i experienced february 29th and lived to tell about it! :)

Beautiful People: Ryan {Round Two}

2012-02-24T13:41:00.002-08:00

I wasn't sure who to do for Beautiful People this month. I'm plotting for Avary's story, and there are plenty of characters I need to discover more about, including Avary herself. So I was reluctant to do Ryan again. However, Ryan's been pulling at me to discover more about him, and the idea of him just won't ever go away.

So, my characters won again. Ryan is quite pleased about this, as you can see.

1. If your character could be played by any actor, who would it be?
Liam Hemsworth. This is a strange choice, considering the only full-length movie I've seen him in is The Last Song, a movie that I easily forgot. (However, this will change when The Hunger Games comes out.) I actually decided on Liam when I saw the music video for Colder Weather. I'd already been looking for Ryan's face, and then the two ideas collided to make... well, Ryan.

2. Does your character have a specific theme song?
Colder Weather by Zac Brown Band. The lyrics seemed particularly suited to be made into a character. I already had the character of Ryan in mind but he was extremely bland. He needed more depth, so I decided to make him into a gypsy, inspired by the lyrics of the song. Thanks to Pip for introducing me to this song.

(Interesting tidbit: Ryan originally was named Brian McGuire, a subject of another BP post. Brian and Violet are now... nonexistent.)

3. What’s their worst childhood memory?
The day his father left. And the day that Ryan himself left home as well. He'll never forgive himself for leaving his family behind, and yet he can't bring himself to go back.

4. If your character had a superpower, what would it be?
Hmm... this is a hard question. Judging by his penchant for wandering and travelling, I think teleportation would be a good fit. Either that or flying. However, neither of those quite fit his personality, which is very strong, but I can't think of anything that would.

5. If your character crashed on an island with a bunch of other people, how would your character help the group survive?
He'd be reluctant, but eventually his instincts would kick in and he'd become the leader, organizing and delegating in the best way possible for their survival. He doesn't like it, but it's in his blood to be a born leader.

6. Are they married? If not, do they someday wish to be?
He's rather divided on this. He wants to have someone to love and cherish. However, actually settling down is the one thing holding him back from any sort of committed relationship, whether it's a romantic one or not.

7. What is a cause they would die for?
He would die if he knew that it was for the good of those he loves. Contrary to popular belief, Ryan does love, and he loves deeply. He's just reluctant to show it.

8. Would they rather die fighting valiantly, or quietly at home?
Fighting valiantly, I think. He does face death in his novel, and while on the surface it doesn't seem valiant, it really truly is. Ryan longs for adventure, and something bigger.

9. If someone walked up to them and told them they were the child of the prophecy, would they believe them?
Probably not right away. Something akin to this does happen in the novel, actually, just not quite the way you might expect. If you tell him something surprising, he'll believe it eventually, but it'll take a while. First, he tries to brush it off, and if he does start to believe it might be possible, he does so with quite a bit of skepticism.

10. Do they prefer the country or the city?
Depends on the day, or wherever his wandering mood takes him. The country calls to him with its peaceful woods and calm atmosphere. However, the cities are where he can find work. Both of them have their benefits.

{ You've got a gypsy soul to blame, and you were born for leaving. }

- a song lyric from Colder Weather that pretty much sums up Ryan's entire existence.

Beautiful People - February Edition

2012-02-20T19:44:00.000-08:00

Welcome back to the February edition of Beautiful People! Beautiful People is a monthly blog thing designed by Georgie Penn and I to help you get to know your characters. You can click here to read the first post, or click here to view the FAQ.

We've tried to keep these neutral so you can answer them regardless of genre. However, if you do write fantasy or sci/fi, try to adapt them so that they do fit your genre, or pose the question as if your character was in a modern world.

Oh, and feel free to submit your own questions as well. Just leave them in a comment on either my blog or Georgie's.

So, without further ado, here's the questions for this round of Beautiful People.

1. If your character could be played by any actor, who would it be?
2. Does your character have a specific theme song?
3. What’s their worst childhood memory?
4. If your character had a superpower, what would it be?
5. If your character crashed on an island with a bunch of other people, how would your character help the group survive?
6. Are they married? If not, do they someday wish to be?
7. What is a cause they would die for?
8. Would they rather die fighting valiantly, or quietly at home?
9. If someone walked up to them and told them they were the child of the prophecy, would they believe them?
10. Do they prefer the country or the city?

Don't forget to sign the Linky!

My Invisible Valentine

2012-02-14T20:54:00.000-08:00

Guys, meet my valentine.

Okay, okay, so... not really. Calm down, ladies. He's taken. By a pretty awesome elf lady.

Right. Anyway. Let's try this again. My valentine:

Meet Robin Hood. You may also recognize him as a fox or a variety of other faces.

Wait... what did you say? He's taken too?

Oh, of course. By Maid Marian. How could I forget?

Okay, fine. My real valentine... well, He's invisible. He also walks on water. And, well, I love Him a lot.

And He might just look a little bit like Aragorn. Or maybe that's just me.

That awkward moment when you have a valentine... he's just invisible.

- my Twitter

P.S. - If you're looking for a humorous, slightly satirical view on Valentine's Day, here's your video.

Chewing Is Overrated

2012-02-13T21:07:00.000-08:00

There are probably several reasons I haven't blogged in a while.

I rather enjoyed having Liam Hemsworth at the top of my blog this whole time. *awkward confession* No, really. My Ryan is pretty cool.
I've been lacking inspiration. Seriously. Let me know if you find him.
And last but not least, jaw pain.

I've had chronic pain for my whole life and was recently diagnosed two years ago. One of the symptoms that has recently reared its ugly head is jaw pain.

At first, we thought it was TMJ. It may in fact be TMJ. However, I went to the orthodontist about two weeks ago, and we had a startling revelation.

My jaw is severely misaligned.

The diagnosis?

I need braces.

Since then, my jaw pain has increased for some reason. Today I could not chew anything. I ate yogurt for breakfast, had two protein shakes for lunch, ate soggy corn flakes as an afternoon snack, and then had sweet potatoes and tiny tiny pieces of pork chop for dinner. *sigh*

Anyway, I'll try to put up some new material on the ol' blog soon. And if you see Inspiration, please hog-tie him and send him my way. Thanks!

Beautiful People: Ryan

2012-01-29T19:03:00.000-08:00

Oh, I wanna see you again

But I'm stuck in colder weather

Maybe tomorrow will be better

Can I call you then?

Cause I'm a ramblin' man

I ain't ever gonna change

I gotta gypsy soul to blame

And I was born for leavin' (born for leavin')

- Colder Weather, Zac Brown Band

1. If your character’s house burned down, and they were left with nothing but the clothes on their back, what would they do? Where would they go?
Ryan is in Avary's story, and... well, let's just say he's a bit of a loner. A gypsy. So, he rents out places and then quickly moves on a few months later. I'm not sure if having his house burn down would even phase him. Still, if it did, he'd probably rebound quickly and then find another place to live.

2. Are they happy with where they are in life, or would they like to move on?
HAHAHA.

*ahem* Excuse me.

Ryan is usually never satisfied. Well, he can be satisfied, but it usually doesn't last long. So the downside of his gypsy-ish personality is that he has a case of the wanderlust and definitely wants to move on. All. The. Stinking. Time.

3. Are they well-paid?
Ryan doesn't usually have a set job for very long. He's kind of like a hobo in the Great Depression days; he does whatever he can to make a buck. So, it really depends on the time, place, and job he has. Though I can say this, he has never been and probably never will be well-off. Usually, he has just enough to scrape by.

4. Can they read?
No, actually, he can't. At first I had put it down as a 'yes', but I think it would add an interesting twist to the plot if he couldn't read.

Beautiful People: Where you come up with dastardly deeds and interesting plot devices, all useful in torturing your characters.

5. What languages do they speak?
English. And sarcasm.

6. What is their biggest mistake?
Dropping out of school and leaving his family behind.

7. What did they play with most as a child?
A spinning top, along with a few toy cars. He would lay on his stomach, watching the top spin round and round on the floor. Also, he fashioned a bow and arrow out of sticks.

8. What are their thoughts on politics?
He's really apathetic, to be honest. Sad to say, I don't really think he cares. Politics bother him, no matter who's running for office, and he has more important things to worry about, like getting his next meal.

9. What is their expected life time?
Um... in a normal world, Ryan would live a happy life, settle down, raise a family, and die at a ripe old age.

This is not a normal world.

Due to several interesting occurrences (*cough*torturousplotdevices*cough*) he suddenly finds himself at risk of losing himself forever.

So, the answer to this question would be... nobody knows. In fact, his time on earth might be cut drastically short.

10. If they were falsely accused of murder, what would they do? How would they react?
He would take it with jaw clenched, all the while having anger bottled up inside. He'd do well to keep a hold on his emotions, so well, in fact, that he'd stuff them down into the deepest depths of his soul, never to be seen again. Speaking of never being seen again, that's exactly what Ryan would do. He'd take the accusations, and then he'd leave, running away to another place where no one knew him.

"I'm a runner, not a fighter." -Ryan

And I love you but I leave you
I don't want you but I need you
You know it's you who calls me back here
You've got a gypsy-soul to blameAnd you were born for leavin'...
[Colder Weather]

The Author's Giveaway Winners

2012-01-25T16:40:00.000-08:00

And now, I would like to introduce my very first vlog, starring me, Georgie, and Fin. :)

Anna Mittower, you won the typewriter print donated by Emily @ Anna Delores Photography!

Keaghan, you won the Shakespeare Inspiration Dice donated by Jennifer @ Palimpsestic!

Charity, you won the ornament donated by Faith from Inspirations by Faith!

Ashley, you won the notecards donated by Marguerite @ Piccadilly Post!

Melody, you won the author silhouette by Kirsten @ Hello Grey Day!

Winners, please email me at mountainfireflower[at]gmail[dot]com. Please email me by this weekend, otherwise we shall have to choose different winners.

Also, Anna, Ashley, and Melody, you get a choice on which prize you get, so please include that in your email.

Thanks for entering, and congratulations to those who won!

You may be able to bribe us into doing more vlogs. Just leave lots of offerings of cereal, rainbows, and other pleasant things.

the giveaway is over... and other stuff

2012-01-23T20:55:00.000-08:00

I was hoping to do a vlog, but the time got away from me and I didn't have a chance. However, Fin and Georgie did put a vlog together, so you should go watch it! I'm basically writing here to announce the same thing they did: The Author's Giveaway is officially over. We'll be announcing the winners someday very soon, so keep your eyes open for that!

And now I shall add a few random notes to make this post more interesting.

First of all... this video is wonderful.

On a writing-related note, I've been replotting Avary's story, and I'm coming up with some great ideas. So excited. I love writing (when my characters cooperate, that is).

And, lastly, I got a haircut. Just a little trim, really, but much of my evening consisted of wandering aimlessly around the mall. If you saw a girl looking slightly dazed carrying a "Keep Calm and Rock Out" notebook... yeah, that was probably me. ;)

(In addition to a haircut, I also got a Pinterest. Yup, I caved. And... I like it a lot. Find me here.)

Beautiful People - January Edition

2012-01-21T13:07:00.000-08:00

Lots of you have asked if Beautiful People would be continuing this year, and the answer is yes! Georgie and I are really excited to start it up again.

Just a quick brush-up on the basics: Beautiful People is a blog meme for writers hosted by Georgie Penn and I. Basically, we post questions, and you answer them about your characters. It's designed to help you get to know your characters better and on a deeper level. (You can find out more by reading the introductory post and the FAQ.)

We've tried to keep these neutral so you can answer them regardless of genre. However, if you do write fantasy or sci/fi, try to adapt them so that they do fit your genre, or pose the question as if your character was in a modern world.

Oh, and feel free to submit your own questions as well. Just leave them in a comment on either my blog or Georgie's.

I'd like to thank The Director @ Castles, Quills, and Cameras. She suggested that we try writing up scenarios and then asking how your character would respond. Thanks so much, Teedee! ;) We loved your idea, and hopefully it'll help BP be even more interesting. :P

Here is this month's round of questions.

1. If your character’s house burned down, and they were left with nothing but the clothes on their back, what would they do? Where would they go?
2. Are they happy with where they are in life, or would they like to move on?
3. Are they well-paid?
4. Can they read?
5. What languages do they speak?
6. What is their biggest mistake?
7. What did they play with most as a child?
8. What are their thoughts on politics?
9. What is their expected life time?
10. If they were falsely accused of murder, what would they do? How would they react?

Also, there are only three more days to enter The Author's Giveaway! Some of you have been unable to comment on my blog because of technical reasons. If this is the case, and you wanted to enter the giveaway but couldn't, please send me an email (mountainfireflower [at] gmail [dot] com).

If you haven't entered yet, you can find out how by clicking here.

The Author's Giveaway: Enter Here!

2012-01-10T10:26:00.000-08:00

Alright, here is the question which you shall answer in order to be entered in the ever-awesome Author's Giveaway:

Who is your favorite literary character, and why?

For me, I'd have to say Lucy Pevensie from The Chronicles of Narnia. (Picking my favorite was hard though since I have so many. Way too many. Flynn Rider for one.)

As for why... I just love her steadfast faith in Aslan, her childlike innocence, and how valiant she is.

As for why I like Flynn Rider... well, that's a whole different story. :P

Now it's your turn to answer, then head on over to Fin & Georgie's blogs now to answer their questions too. If you answer all three questions, you get entered into the giveaway 3 times. You can answer by either commenting on each post, or post all three answers on your own blog. We would also be grateful if you included a link back to the giveaway. If you decide to do this, comment with the link to the post so we are able to read your answers! Pretty simple, right?

You can see the prizes for the giveaway by clicking here.

The Author's Giveaway

2012-01-09T09:52:00.000-08:00

If you've been hanging around this blog for any length of time, you'll know that I love words. I love to write them; I love to read them.

"I love writing. I love the swirl and swing of words as they tangle with human emotions." -James Michener

Combine that with my love of awesome blog giveaways, and throw in two of my dear friends, and you get an author's giveaway!

What can you win by entering? I'll show you.

Emily from Anna Delores Photography has offered to donate one beautiful print from her Etsy shop! While she has a stunning collection of typewriter prints bound to please any writer, you can also find almost anything to suit your taste. The winner can choose any print from the shop and can get it in one of three sizes; 8x8", 8x10", or 8x12". Be sure to check out Emily's blog as well!

Marguerite from Piccadilly Post will be giving away an Author Postage Note Card set of four. Winners choice of three different authors. Robert Penn Warren, Steven Vincent Benet, or Thornton Wilder. Each set comes with four lined note cards printed with "write your own story" and a thermographed vintage typewriter image. The entire set includes; four note cards, four envelopes, four envelope wraps, four postage stamps, and is packaged in an envelope folder tied with twine.

One winner will receive their choice of author silhouette from Hello Grey Day. Winner will be able to choose author, and color of the silhouette. This would make a beautiful display in any writer, or book lovers bedroom, or library. Kirsten also has a facebook page for her shop.

Don't we all wish some of the great authors were still alive, to push us in the right direction when we come across writer's block? I guess we'll have to settle for the second best thing. These are a set of Shakespeare Inspiration Dice. Made by Jennifer at Palimpsestic, these dice were created to inspire the beginning, the middle, or the end of any story.

This beautiful ornament has been donated by Faith from Inspirations by Faith. It will make a lovely addition to any writer's Christmas tree next year! Filled phrases from Pride and Prejudice makes it perfect for any literary lover!

How do I enter?

Entering will be simple. Fin, Georgie, and myself will all be posting questions on our blogs tomorrow. Each blog will have one question posted. Each question you answer will gain you one entry. You can answer by either commenting on each post, or post all three answers on your own blog. We would also be grateful if you included a link back to the giveaway. If you decide to do this, comment with the link to the post so we are able to read your answers!

While not mandatory to share the giveaway, we would appreciate any advertisement you felt like sharing.

Deadline for entering is January 23rd. Winner's will be chosen randomly and announced shortly after the 23rd, on all three blogs.

Have fun, and good luck!

for the dreamers.

2012-01-02T13:01:00.000-08:00

When I was little, I wanted to be an inventor.

I kept thinking of ways I could make things better, make things different. Change the world.

I used to think it was weird that I could find amusement in staring at anything and everything. Or that I pretended I was somewhere else. My imagination was on overdrive then. Still is.

I used to think it was strange that I felt hope and joy in the most ordinary things. Staring out my window for example. Pretending I was someone else, somewhere else. Dreaming about extraordinary in the midst of my daily life.

Lately, I've discovered I'm a dreamer. It's when I'm dreaming that I feel alive. It's when I'm dreaming that I feel like... me. I've been trying to "grow up" and stuff down my imagination, but God's been showing me that it's okay to be a dreamer. And really, maybe that wasn't as weird as I had once thought.

So this is for the dreamers. The ones who think they're alone. They're the ones with stardust in their eyes as they sit and look for beauty in everything. Those who think that reality is a lovely place, but they wouldn't want to live there.

This is for the ones who love. Who love deeply. Fully. Who believe that life is more than just what we can see. The ones who believe that there's a Man out there who loves perfectly. Completely. Truly.

This is for the artists. The whimsical, creative types. The ones who can't help but paint, whether it's with paintbrushes, canvases, or words. The ones who return full circle to find out that they are indeed dreamers, and lovers, and artists. All at the same time.

Life isn't perfect, but it can be wonderful. Thank you to the dreamers for making the world a better place.

This is for you. And for me. And for all of those who dream.

Even though you may feel it, you're not strange. There are thousands of others like you.

You're not alone.

Ireland & Russian Spies

2012-01-01T17:45:00.000-08:00

This set pretty sums up my life for the past couple of days. It was made by my dear friend Tessa.

(She makes brilliant Polyvore sets. She has also just become aware of the awesomeness of Ireland and Celtic Thunder.)

Welcome to my world. I'll see you in Ireland. ;)

On a side note, I'm hoping to emerge from my blogging break pretty soon. Until then, happy 2012!

please pray

2011-12-23T14:32:00.000-08:00

URGENT PRAYER REQUEST:

One of my dear friends has a little brother named Noah who has been struggling his whole life with a mitochondrial disorder. This disorder is very serious and has no cure. He's only five years old and has already been through so much.

He's been in and out of the hospital a lot, but as of today, he is very sick. I was just IM'ed by his older sister who told me that he's not responding to medication. This may mean that his kidneys are failing. They'll try again one more time, but if he doesn't respond, this means they have 2-3 days with him at the most. Please, please be praying for this precious family however you feel led.

They have a blog if you want more info: http://www.prayingfornoah.com/

the stable

2011-12-22T21:12:00.000-08:00

Immanuel.

God with us.

Why did he do this? Why? Why?

To be born in a stable.

The humblest of places.

No, seriously. Let me be as honest as I can. Stables are probably not your ideal place for a momentous event. [Would you get married in a stable? Not me.]

I've never been in a stable, but I can imagine it. Dung. Animals. Hay. Not exactly glamorous.

[I wonder how bad the risk of infection was for giving birth in a...stable. My inner germophobe cringes at the thought.]

Why?

Immanuel. God with us.

If you doubt that the love of Jesus surpasses all others, look at this. Look at his manger scene. See him laying in the hay?

So often we focus on the birth, but the reason Jesus came was for the death and the life after that.

He did this for you.

That is love. True love.

Immanuel. God with us.

“In our world too, a stable once had something inside it that was bigger than our whole world.”

- Queen Lucy, The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis.

A Novel Idea

2011-12-17T14:12:00.000-08:00

When I switched blogging platforms, I essentially vowed that I'd sworn off tags forever.

It appears that I have broken that vow; not for mere pleasure (okay, maybe that's a bonus), but for the sake of sharing my novel with you.

Many thanks to Katie @ Whisperings of the Pen for tagging me with this awesome tag. It's such a unique questionnaire.

And now I present to you another long-winded speech about my novel. (But this time, you get to read a few snippets of it as well!)

1. Who are the main characters?

Gavin Gray, a blacksmith who has dreamed of legends long past. Riah Gray, his sister, who is feisty and unpredictable. Torin, the prince of their land who has many grudges and secrets. Chasiel, the princess and Torin's sister, who is sweet and unassuming, and has received a certain blacksmith's love.

2. How did you get the idea for this story?

I sat and stared at the wall, and racked my brain with ideas. Smacked my head against the wall a few times to jar my brain into working, and then repeated the whole process.

I also grabbed a sword and ran after that fickle thing called Inspiration, threatening to skewer it unless it cooperated.

All kidding aside, it was a long process - or at least it felt that way. I had the idea of Chasiel and Torin first, who came along around the end of 2009-early 2010. Then Gray came along, pushing his way into my mind and compelling me to write a story about him. Shortly after Gray was established, I decided to put him together with Chasiel and Torin. Then I just needed a plot - which was one thing I was sorely lacking.

Riah, on the other hand, was one of the hardest characters to figure out. At first her name was Chaya Seagull and she had a completely different story entirely. Several items were connected to her, such as a silver necklace, a strong personality, and mountains by the sea. This annoyed me greatly because there was no way I could think of to connect it with Chasiel and Torin. There's nothing more irksome than a plot that won't cooperate.

One day, I decided that I was going to make it work, even if it meant majorly changing plot points. All of a sudden, the pieces fell into place, and the silver necklace became instrumental to the whole novel. Chaya Seagull became Riah, a feisty young woman who has grown up under her brother's influence and is essentially beyond being tamed. She is one of my favorite characters to write, ever. I think I came up with the bare bones of a plot that afternoon, and then spent the rest of the time counting down to NaNo and outlining chapter-by-chapter in a notebook.

3. What genre is this story?

Fantasy. It's the first fantasy book I've written in way too long, and I'm beginning to think I've finally found the stories I was meant to write.

4. Describe your book in three thoughts:
Bah, humbug. I always dislike summing up my book like this. Oh well.

Gray has always dreamed of finding a treasure that the legends speak of. However, the silver is far from a secret, and others dream of finding it as well, much to Gray's disadvantage. Through a series of events, he ends up doing what he's always dreamed of... but will it be worth it in the end?

5. The bit that describes an obscure piece of real life best:

His eyes flicker to Chasiel. An uncomfortable silence hangs in the air, like the elephant in the room. Everyone knows it’s there, but no one wants to talk about it.

6. The funniest line said by a side-character thus far:

My main characters are much funnier than my side-character. Nevertheless...

[Riah:] “Now I only wish I could knock some sense into that thick head of his.”
Bereket lets out a short, loud, barking laugh. “Ha! Good luck with that. Gray rarely ever listens to common sense.”

7. Your favorite piece of description:

His face was worn, his fingers tough from years of battle—years of fighting for his country with both his pen and his sword.

8. Your biggest fear in the writing of this story:

It's not so much the writing part of it that I'm afraid of as it is the editing. Writing is fine. I can write a bad first draft very, very easily. But when I have to actually fix the mistakes I've made? Oy.

9. Last full sentence you wrote:

The hill started to descend, and Athens skidded down the hill as he attempted to find a foothold.

10. Favorite character thus far:

Riah. Oh my goodness, Riah. She's impossible and yet amusing all at the same time.

11. What books have been written or have you read that are similar in style and flavor to your novel?

You know, the funny thing is that I haven't really ever read anything similar to my novel. It kind of defies the typical fantasy stigma. However, I've taken inspiration from The Chronicles of Narnia, The Lord of the Rings, and the BBC show Robin Hood, respectively. Another novel that has similarities to mine is The Door Within by Wayne Thomas Batson. I read this book recently and absolutely loved it.

12. If it was destined to become a book on tape, who would you wish to read it?

Liam Neeson. His voice is so expressive and one of my favorites.

~

other links regarding Silver Tears: synopsis, etc.

Note: I'm currently on hiatus writing Silver Tears, and currently have another smattering of words that could, potentially, become a novel. As of yet it's completely jumbled, so wish me luck with that. This new inkling of a story's name is... well, you'll just have to guess. ;)

And now, I tag:

Georgie @ Before My Penn Has Gleaned

Fin @ The Penn Is Mightier Than the Sword

Rachelle @ Inspiring Daring

Hannah @ The Road Goes Ever On

And... you, if you feel so inclined. ;)

introducing my blog, in a nutshell

2011-12-13T19:00:00.000-08:00

i have a sinus infection, hence the reason i'm typing in lowercase. it seems like a good excuse. :P

Elisabeth @ Something Solid Out of Air (an amazing name for an amazing blog :) did a Wordle for her blog, so i decided to do one for mine as well. i wonder, what do you think i post about a lot? ;)

also, i made a Facebook page for my blog. this was due in part to the fact that i wanted one central place to post my blog updates. still, i'm not a huge fan of Facebook... but if YOU are, you can check out the page here.

music to my ears {because everyone loves penguins.}

2011-12-12T20:48:00.000-08:00

this is what i've been listening to lately. lately, as in since yesterday. I ♥ penguins.

P.S. - For the sake of posterity...

100 followers. Wow. Thank you all so much. *hugs*

How to Control Your Characters

2011-12-08T14:24:00.000-08:00

Let me try to sum it up simply, in two words.

You can't.

Yes, the characters do belong to you, but just wait. Soon they'll start developing their own brains. Their own personalities. Their own way of doing things.

And sometimes, you may just be wondering if you're even the author at all.

Your main male protagonist, who had been perfectly well behaved up until chapter 22, may just start rebelling. "Yes, you remember me? You amputated my leg in chapter 10! I'll never forgive you for that!" Soon the other characters will join in, waving signs of protest and going on strike.

This, I think, is what is more formally known as writer's block.

Characters simply won't obey. This point has been proven to me time and time again. The other night was the most recent evidence of this, when a character showed up in my brain waving a rather large sign. "HELLO! My name is Beckett! I will be appearing in your next story, so just deal with it."

Yep, you guessed it. He is now in my story.

I've been thinking... maybe it isn't a bad thing when characters don't obey. Maybe it's a good thing.

And maybe, it just means that we're doing a good job with them.

On a more personal note, I have now decided to take a break from my NaNo novel, Silver Tears. It's not that I don't like the novel anymore, and I fully intend to finish it. I'm just having a hard time connecting, and my inspiration has completely run dry.

So, I have a new novel. This one started itself and I really need to find its plot. And yes, Beckett is in said novel. Now it's just a matter of finding out where this novel is taking me.

See? I can't control my novels, either. *sigh*

Writing Is Like Toothpaste

2011-12-05T11:03:00.000-08:00

You know what happens when you've almost used up all your toothpaste? The toothpaste bottle gets all gunky and stagnant, and you nearly burst a blood vessel by trying to squeeze it out. After pushing until your knuckles turn white, you only get a meager bit of toothpaste that drizzles out.

Yep, that's what's happening in my writing life right now.

It's not like I'm not writing. Thanks to Georgie's handy box of writing prompts, I've written three short stories. One of them is about fire and tulips, the other about a New Year's Eve party, and the most confusing is about forbidden spheres. However, when it comes to my current WIP, Silver Tears, I'm hitting a wall.

Again.

NaNo ended five days ago, and since then I've only written about 2,000 words. This is hard, especially when 2k was my average per day. Still, I've hit a point in my writing where whatever I wrote on my outline is vague, if there's anything written at all.

I, of course, could just write. That would be the simplest option, and would also be taking my own advice. But I'm trying to get over my inner-editor. You know, the one that says, You MUST have the first draft perfect. This writing stinks. You'll never write anything good.

Yep, that one.

Is duct tape an acceptable method of tying up my inner editor, critiquer, and all-around annoyance? On second thought, maybe I should just throw him in the closet.

At any rate, I'm hoping to get past this wall. Maybe I need a sledgehammer to knock it down. Either that, or maybe getting a grappling hook would help me climb over it.

You know how in my last post I said this quote?

You can't wait for inspiration to come to you.
You have to go after it with a sword.

I think I need a bigger sword.

{side note: I've always wondered... why is bouquet spelled with two u's? I can understand the one after the q, but the first u always gets me.}

The Post-November Letdown

2011-12-02T13:45:00.000-08:00

Something big happened this November:

I became a writer again.

But before I explain, let me say this. It's no secret: November has officially come to a close, and with that, so has NaNoWriMo.

It's always hard, after spending all your time writing, to adjust back to normal life. I was writing all day, every day, or at least that's how it seemed. Now that NaNo is over, I don't know what to do with myself.

However, now that I've been writing this long and this hard, I won't be able to stop.

See, I've always been a writer. Putting pen to paper. Throwing words on a page. Painting landscapes of the mind. Attempting to introduce people to my world and tell them my deepest thoughts and desires.

But somewhere along the line, that got tainted by the fear of failure.

I don't think I've really written anything for the past 2 or 3 years. Yes, of course, I've written things... but I haven't truly written. I haven't let my fingers fly or let the words take their course. I haven't really let my stories live. I've stopped after the first few hundred words. I was afraid to try because I was afraid to fail.

And then, this November, I realized that I can't really call myself a writer unless I write. If I'm serious about my writing career and my dream of sharing my words with the world, it's going to take dedication. Sweat. Tears. And a whole lot of patience.

And hopefully inspiration, if it will manage to stick around for long enough.

You can't wait for inspiration to come to you.
You have to go after it with a sword.

My post-NaNo plans include finishing my novel, which has taken on a mind of its own. It's actually becoming real to me, and I'm proud to call it my own. It's not perfect, yes, but no first draft is. I just have to keep telling myself that (and maybe shove my inner editor in a closet while I'm at it). I'm at about 56,000 words and I still have a lot of plot left... too much plot. I'm going to keep writing, but it doesn't feel the same. I miss the rush of words as I try to finish writing my thoughts before bed. I miss the hype, the decorum, and the excitement. I'll keep writing, but it doesn't feel like a sprint anymore. It feels like a slow walk. I'm able to actually focus on the words, which is both a good thing and a bad thing.

I admire you writerly types; yes, those people whose veins flow with inspiration rather than blood. I admire you. Because it isn't easy; writing a novel in a month. It isn't easy writing a novel, period. I know that now. But the thing I've discovered is, writing is hard. It's not for the faint of heart.

But overall, we have to decide: is it worth it?

I think it is.

Hello, my name is Kylie,
and I am a writer.

{post script: speaking of writing, Georgie, Fin, and I have a surprise for you coming up shortly. so refill your coffee mugs and stay tuned. we'll be back.} :)

To Those Who Are Searching

2011-11-30T15:57:00.000-08:00

I won't deny it: I get some really, really weird referrals from Google. The search terms that people use when finding my site are nothing more than extraordinary, and sometimes, they're just plain weird.

I've decided to offer an apology to those who have searched and have not found.

~~~

Dear person who searched for "keep calm and call batman shirt",

I do not sell that shirt, I'm afraid. I am but a lowly blogger amongst the blogosphere who just happened to blog about it. The post in question that you probably found is, admittedly, rather stupid, and it probably doesn't help all that much. I'm not sure why you ended up here of all places, since I don't really talk about Batman on my blog all that often, and when I do, it usually has something to do with weird dreams and Polyvore sets. Nevertheless, I highly support your search for a place to purchase the Keep Calm and Call Batman shirt! Let me know when you find what you're looking for!

Sincerely,
-Miss Polyvore

~~~

Dear person who searched for "damian mcginty barefoot",

Simply put, you baffle me, and so does Google. I honestly have no idea why those search terms led to my blog, and I apologize for the inconvenience. The only thing I found that seemed remotely helpful is this post, where I just happened to mention Damian McGinty and the word barefoot in the same post. It's fitting because the title of the post is Awkwardly Awesome. I can't decide whether this search term is awesome, or just plain awkward. I'm leaning towards the latter.

Sincerely,
-Confused

~~~

Dear person who searched for "hanging cups white",

Somehow, you ended up here, and I have no idea why. All I can say is... huh???

Sincerely,
-Even More Confused

~~~

Dear person who searched for "owl city wedding song",

I believe I may have misled you. To my knowledge, Owl City has not produced a wedding song. However, I do talk about him on my blog quite often, and I did happen to mention that I may want to have his song played at my wedding. This is probably how you have gotten to my blog. You can find the source of this confusing mix-up here. Once again, I apologize.

Sincerely,
-A Misleading Hoot Owl

~~~

Dear person who searched for "yellow ice cream truck with a bright smile",

Huh???

Sincerely,
-I'm Still Confused

~~~

Dear person who searched for "further up and further in blog",

Your search terms are quite normal, and you are in the right place. Thank you for visiting. :)

Sincerely,
-Me.

Cats Love Us, Therefore We Must Love Them

2011-11-28T20:34:00.000-08:00

(This post is meant to be read with a sophisticated British accent.)

I have two cats. Their names are Tuxedo and Chessie. However, Tuxedo is the one I'm going to be focusing on today, and he is affectionately known as Tux or Tuxy.

Tux is a Manx cat, which means, among other things, that he does not have a tail. We chose this breed of cat because they don't have the enzyme in their saliva that causes dander. (This arrangement is beneficial to my father, who is allergic to cats and consequently their dander.)

Up until this summer, Tuxedo was affectionately known as my "brother's" cat. Or rather, my brother was known as Tuxedo's person. Whenever Tux desired to be petted, or other such human companionship, my brother was the one he sought. This friendship was accepted and/or tolerated by either party.

However, things change. Furthermore, all things must come to an end. This thing came to an abrupt end this summer when my brother and I switched rooms. Actually, he moved to the basement, and I occupied his room. (I had formerly been rooming with my sister.)

It seems that, with the change of occupants in my brother's former room, Tux has become slightly confused. Somehow, he has managed to mix me up with my brother. Therefore, I am now Tux's person. Every time he desires love and attention, he comes to me.

This is a very annoying relationship.

But, I shall let you see for yourself by watching this video.

Dear Tuxedo,
I love you very much. However, it would please me greatly if you would stop taking over my desk as if you were the emperor of the world. Pretty please?
*whispers like a secret agent, then slams the phone shut* Kthanxbai.

In Which I Cross the Finish Line

2011-11-27T15:48:00.000-08:00

And so... I won NaNoWriMo.

After being away for three-ish days for Thanksgiving, I hadn't written a word. It was the same story yesterday. I was ridiculously sick yesterday, due to my fatigue from the aforementioned trip, so I didn't write much.

(Not to mention I got my first bloody nose, cried a lot due to being so tired, and threw up. But that's another story for another time.)

My wordcount at the beginning of the day today was 47,540. That was about 2,500 words away. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to do it, considering I woke up with such a bad headache. (Advil is my friend, though.)

However, I decided that I'd like to finish today, and after my headache lessened a bit, I spent the afternoon writing. I hit 50,000 a little while ago, and I'm excited, sad, and happy, all at the same time.

To be honest, this was one of the worst weeks I've ever had. But now that I've reached 50k, my novel is still going at least reasonably well, and we're decorating for Christmas tonight, I'm thankful. This is the perfect ending to my weekend. The rest of our evening includes putting ornaments on the tree, and watching Elf.

I'm so glad that good times in life come along with the bad. I'm even thankful for the bad things in life - especially the bad things, I think.

And yes, I'm really thankful that I finished NaNo! There's just one problem: my novel is really, really long. My ending is nowhere in sight, and I have a lot of plot to cover still. Hmm...

At any rate, my Christmas tree needs to be decorated. If you'd like to read more about my noveling journey this November, check out The NaNo Diaries.

And as a final note, this explains perfectly how I feel as NaNoWriMo draws to a close.

Granny Wendy: So... your adventures are over.
Peter Banning: Oh, no. To live... to live would be an awfully big adventure.
- Hook

A Writerly Sort Of Update.

2011-11-22T20:47:00.000-08:00

[Yes, I like to make up words, such as writerly.]

It's day 22 of NaNo, and we're nearing the end of week three. So, I thought it was high time that I gave you all an update, considering this blog has been sparsely updated as of late.

I'm currently plugging away at my story, and have managed a wordcount of 46,103 as of yesterday. (I haven't written anything today. *gasp*) As for how my story is going... well, I have my ups and downs. It's... interesting. And I'm learning just how hard writing can be.

So, I'm exactly 3,897 words away from the finish.

I can do this.

I think I can, I think I can... ;)

The nice thing about NaNo is that it actually forces me to write. I love to write, don't get me wrong, but it's the actual writing part that's hard. In other words, I have an insane amount of plots but 0% motivation to begin/finish them.

However, this year I've realized how much I missed this. I've missed just sitting down and typing my heart out. Spilling words onto the page, be it in the form of ink or keystrokes. I want to write for the sake of writing, because I love it so much. I can't stop.

So, this is my official post letting you know this one thing: I've started writing, and I can't stop.

As for post-NaNo plans, I hope to edit Silver Tears once it's finished, and try to polish it as much as I can. Editing... well, it's going to be interesting. I'm not quite thinking about that yet. ;)

Ironically, I'm plotting another novel to work on when my NaNo novel, Silver Tears, is finished. Hopefully you'll be getting some sneak peeks of it soon. :)

Also, please forgive the lack of coherency in this post. It's been sitting in my drafts since earlier this afternoon, but I think I'm going to hit publish now before I keep going. I'm braindead, can't you tell?

Oh, one more thing! If you'd like to read a synopsis of my novel, you can go ahead and check it out on my writing projects page here.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, lovelies!

Beautiful People - Holiday Edition

2011-11-19T19:52:00.000-08:00

Hello, and welcome to Beautiful People! In short, BP is a monthly blog party for writers hosted by myself and Georgie Penn. If you'd like to learn more, you can find out by reading the introductory post or check out the FAQ.

Now that that's out of the way, read on!

This month is our holiday edition, including questions about Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the New Year. Holidays are something that I don't really think about in the context of novel writing, so I think it'll be interesting to find out what my characters think about it.

If you're a fantasy writer like I am, adapt these questions the best way you see fit. I'm sure your characters celebrate somehow, right? Even if it's just a birthday celebration or a banquet, we want to know how your characters celebrate and have fun.

One last note: We'll be taking a break in December from Beautiful People since the holidays tend to be very busy for most people. So after this round of questions, we'll see you in January! :)

Here are this month's questions.

1. What kind of holidays do they celebrate, if any?
2. What are they most thankful for?
3. Do they have any family traditions?
4. What is their most memorable holiday memory?
5. What is the most memorable gift they have ever received?
6. Do they consider it important to be with family during celebrations?
7. Do they usually wait till the last minute to purchase gifts, or do they buy them ridiculously early?
8. Favorite Christmas song? For fantasy authors, is music a part of their celebration?
9. Do they celebrate for religious reasons?
10. How do they celebrate the beginning of the new year?

Don't forget to sign the linky!

Sparks of Life

2011-11-19T08:00:00.000-08:00

One thing that never ceases to baffle me is the process of writing. I know, I know... I've been writing for years now, so I should be accustomed to it, right?

Wrong.

I don't think a writer ever gets used to writing. And if they do, it must be a very boring experience.

I'm of the opinion that I want every one of my novels to be different than the first (unless of course, it's a sequel). This is a recently acquired opinion of mine, to be completely honest, but nevertheless, I believe it. I don't want my writing to get stagnant by reusing the same plots. I want the characters to be different, with different dreams, goals, and ideas. And most of the time, I get my wish.

I'm sure all writers feel the same way.

However, my characters have since taken this matter into their own hands. They enjoy torturing me with their unique personalities. Even though I want each story to be different, this story has become a quilt of all my different stories that never went far. All these ideas and characters have formed together into one cohesive story.

Isn't it amazing how one idea can spark something so much more? It's amazing how our characters somehow graduate from being words on a page to being someone real; someone living and breathing. Or, almost alive.

Ironically, I'm writing this during week three of NaNo. I'm 36,000 words in, and admittedly, my characters are seeming rather stagnant. But I have to go back to step one, when my characters were sparks of life. Those sparks will become a flame, fueling my words and my story.

One word of advice for writers: Choose your characters wisely. After all, you'll be spending thousands of words with them, and it's always good when you don't mind them... too much. Sure, you will mind them sometimes. They may even turn into two-dimensional problems. Yes, they will annoy you... but so will writing. It's not for the faint of heart, people.

Tell me about your sparks of life. Do they inspire you, frustrate you, or baffle you? How do they manage to surprise you, even after all this time?

let go and let grace

2011-11-18T10:25:00.000-08:00

i have some drastic news to tell you.

you can't earn God's grace.

i know, it's hard to accept it. but it's not possible to live life by yourself.

you will fall. you will mature. you will get back up again. you will fall again. you will fail. you will hold onto God's hands.

and you will grow.

grace and growth go hand in hand. grace takes growth, and growth takes grace.

and growth and grace take God.

you can't do it by yourself.

you can't.

Christianity is not about trying to make yourself better. 'self-help' books that they sell in Christian book stores drive me crazy sometimes, though not all of them do. i think it's just the genre that i resent. 'self-help'? what's up with that?

we can't help ourselves.

we have to just be us. love God. hold onto his hand. and let the potter refine the clay.

what are you holding onto? your pride? i know i am.

your hope? i know i am.

Jesus? i know i have to. otherwise i'll never get through.

grow. let God. let go. let grace.

why do we have to depend on religion to keep us in tact? that will never work. in fact, we'll only fail. we'll never measure up to the standard.

but Jesus did. and does.

we have to let go of our guilt to have his glory. we have to admit that we are nothing, and he is something.

as I read on this blog this morning, "I am enough because I AM is enough."

what more could be said than that?

a radical change of love could overtake the church. the bride of Christ. but it's only if we let it.

sometimes i wonder if it's us that are holding us back. you know? i'm holding myself back from abundant life. from joy. i'm choosing to be anxious. but i can't do that. not anymore. i have to step outside my box and be free.

i have to let go, and teeter on the edge of this precipice.

and trust God to catch me when i fall.

linking up with Five Minute Fridays @ The Gypsy Mama. this week's word is grow.

>>click here to participate, too.<<

Authentic People Blog Party: This Is Me

2011-11-12T16:17:00.000-08:00

I'm linking up with Abigail Kraft for her Authentic People blog party, so if you'd like to join the fun, check it out here.

First off, let me introduce myself. For those of you who haven't been here before, my name is Kylie.

Despite my Blogger username, which is Sky, I do not mind being called by either name. In fact, I have a lot of different names, such as Charlotte (Charlie) Penn, Mountie, and Samwise, just to name a few. (Yeah, I collect nicknames. Who knew?)

I started blogging in 2006 and I absolutely love it. Over the past five years, I've met so many great people and even have had the opportunity to meet them in person. The people I've met through blogging remain some of my closest friends.

I am a writer with many thoughts, ideas, characters, and words. I love composing things, whether it be a novel, a poem, a blog post, or a song. I write because I have to, otherwise these ideas would never get out.

I have an amazingly overactive imagination, which can be both good and bad. I have played guitar for about 2 or 3 years now, and my favorite chord is G. I love coffee and drink it every morning. I love watching movies and reading books. (In fact, my mom just came in bearing an armload of books for me to read. :P)

Oh, yeah, and... this is me.

{1} What's the nerdiest/geekiest/weirdest thing about you?

I'm writing this post in HTML mode in Blogger so that I don't have to deal with any unnecessary formatting. Is that not geeky to you? :P

Other than that, I wear glasses. I have very weird fashion sense that tends to be defined as "hodge-podge." And I'm a writer who has characters that seem very, very alive.

Oh, I also have a hard time picking just one nerdy thing about me. Hehe.

{2} If you could live in a fictional universe from any book, movie, or television show, what would it be?

Oh, um, seriously? Do I HAVE to answer this?

I live in fictional universes all the time. I'll bounce from my own imaginings to another created world, like Narnia, Middle-Earth or Locksley.

But if I had to pick a place to stay, it would be Narnia, hands down.

{via spareoom.net}

{3} Little or big, practical or frivolous, what is one of your favorite items in your house?

My room. After sharing a room for almost my whole life, I just got my own room this year. It's so great to have a place to relax in. I would like to say that I keep it perfect and clean, but I don't. In actuality, I should be cleaning it right now. Shh. :P

And followed in close second is my laptop. It's my portal to pretty much anything, whether it be reading blogs, meeting people, chatting with friends, or writing.

{4} Do you like animated movies? If so, what is your favorite?

Um, yes. A thousand times, yes.

My favorite is Tangled.

I even have my own frying pan. See?

And yes, I do use it as a weapon.

Other favorites include Beauty and the Beast, Over the Hedge, The Incredibles, and pretty much any other Disney/Pixar film ever made.

{5} What is your favorite household chore?

I don't have one.

Seriously, I don't have one.

But if I did have to pick one that I at least minorly appreciate, I'd say cleaning off the mirrors in our house. (It's the easiest job I have.)

{6} What's your favorite thing to get at Starbucks (or your favorite coffee shop)?

For the longest time, it was steamed milk. Then I actually started liking coffee and drinking it on a regular basis, and so my mom's love for white chocolate mochas rubbed off on me. (Which is actually really ironic since I don't like white chocolate at all. I'm a fan of dark chocolate all the way.) If I'm feeling especially frivolous I'll order a peppermint white chocolate mocha.

Sadly, I don't go to Starbucks often enough, but I do drink coffee every single morning. A cup of coffee with cream and sugar is the best way to wake up.

{7} What is your favorite pizza topping?
Pepperoni, sausage, and/or bacon. Which, again, is ironic since I don't like sausage in any other way, shape, or form.

My family tolerates three-meat pizza, but a lot of them like pepperoni & pineapple. (I don't like the pineapple so much.) My little sister likes cheese pizza. So overall, we have a lot of different tastes in our family. :P

{8} Waffles or pancakes?

I am finding these questions exceptionally hard to answer.

Pancakes. But waffles are pretty great, too. Anything with syrup that can be served with eggs & bacon is fine by me.

{9} Do you like to play games? If so, what is your favorite?
Apples to Apples and Clue. Apples to Apples because it is downright hilarious, and Clue because I love solving mysteries. :D

{10} Have you ever let anyone win a game?
Yeah. A lot. But in my defense, I have a soft spot in my heart for those who are more disadvantaged than I am (i.e., younger kids).

{11} Have you ever dyed your hair?
No, I haven't really had to. I had very blonde hair when I was younger. When I was but a wee tyke, I wished that I had brown hair, and voila, my hair changed when I got to be around 5 or 6. Sometimes I wonder if I'd still be blonde had I not wished for brown hair. And my hair story is proof that dreams do come true.

It is also even more proof that I am secretly Rapunzel.

{12} Do you make your bed every morning?
I'd like to say that yes, I do make my bed, and my life has no disorder whatsoever.

However, that would be a complete and utter lie.

No, my bed remains unmade.

{13} Picasso or Norman Rockwell?
Norman Rockwell. Yep. Since I don't know much about art, I can't say too much about that. :P

{14} Do you like carpet, tile, or hardwood floors?
Oh, there are advantages to all three. Carpet is perfect for getting out of bed in the morning when it's freezing and your feet are likewise. Tile is very multi-purpose and isn't too hard to clean. Hardwood floors, however, are wonderful for sliding around on in sock-clad feet. (Sadly, I have no hardwood floors.)

Let us consider all three a tie, with different and unique benefits to each. (Don't I sound so diplomatic and indecisive? :P)

{15} If you could put one thing in a safe under your bed, what would it be?
My journals. I've journaled off and on throughout my whole life, and it chronicles my journey as I've grown into who I am now. I'd like to keep them forever, but like all things written by a 10-year-old, they can tend to be embarrassing... hence the reason I'll keep them in a locked safe. ;)

{16} What's your favorite condiment?
Ranch dressing!

{17} Have you ever thrown up on someone (excluding when you were a child)?
Not recently, no. When I was a child, however, it is a much different story. :P

{18} What was the last thing that made you laugh?
Uh... reading over old blog posts and coming across a picture of the character Gwaine from Merlin. (Read this post to see it, if you must.)

Yeah, if I didn't have to be completely honest with you guys for this blog party, I would have probably left that out. ;) I hope you realize what a great honor it is to be graced with the embarrassing moments of my day.

{19} Think fast...what's the first song that pops into your head?
I've Got A Dream from Tangled.

(I think was partly influenced by the fact that Abigail listed "I Have A Dream" for her song, and my mind did word-association. :P Oh well.)

Since some of you probably came over from Abigail's linky, I wanted to say thanks for stopping by!

I'd love to meet you. Comment and tell me a little about yourself, if you feel so inclined.

oh dear

2011-11-09T16:12:00.000-08:00

Today I found myself typing the above phrase.

Oh dear.

It seems so nostalgic. Two words with multiple meanings. These words could be interpreted differently depending on the context.

"Oh, dear, this is terrible!"
"Oh, dear, you make me laugh."
"Oh, dear, we have a flat tire."
"Oh, dear, you are ridiculous."

Or, if you're me, you find yourself coining the phrase, "Oh my dear word." A combination of oh dear and oh my word, of course.

Saying oh dear makes me think of days long past. Of British tea-houses and dainty tea cups. Of cardigans and Irish coasts and wedge shoes.

So I'll sit here, trying to stay warm. No matter what I do, my feet are still cold. I'm wearing both fuzzy socks and fur-lined clogs, but there's still an edge of coldness beneath all the fluffy layers.

I tried drinking green tea a few minutes ago, but gagged once I reached the last mouthful. I made one of the weirdest noises I've ever made when I realized how bitter it was. I really should remember to put sugar in there.

Also, this is a rambling pointless post because I really don't know what else to say... except, Oh dear.

P.S. - I know I've been a bit slack about blog posts as of late, but if you'd like to keep up on my NaNoWriMo journey, I've created a Tumblr just for that purpose. Check it out @ The NaNo Diaries.

in which i am discouraged & brain dead

2011-11-06T15:57:00.000-08:00

ok, so i'll be honest.

despite all my pep talks about NaNoWriMo, and how awesome it was going to be, and how much we'll have fun...

i am burning out.

it's the end of week 1 and i'm wondering if we'll ever get done. if i'll ever have a real, true, cohesive novel in my hands by the end of this month.

i probably won't.

and that's what frustrates me.

yes, i'll have written a novel. i'll have written 50,000 words. but then i have to EDIT. *cue scary music*

can you see why i'm beginning to freak out now?

not only that, but my outline is falling apart. i don't know what i'm doing or what my characters are going to do next. i think i need to poke them with a cattle prong, but the only thing that would work to do so is scheduled for chapter 7, not chapter 5. what am i going to do for 2 chapters until then?

sigh.

okay, i know that you NaNo'ers are probably feeling the same way. so be honest. are you burnt out yet? what's the hardest part of NaNo so far? and are all your perfect plans turning out less-than-perfect?

yeah, mine too.

remember to breathe

2011-11-01T21:04:00.000-07:00

Hello, WriMos (aka, those who are undertaking the NaNoWriMo adventure). How did your first day go?

Mine started out awfully. I hadn't slept well at all last night due to excitement and a bit of anxious anticipation. When I woke up, I began doubting my decision to ever undertake NaNo, and thus became very anxious - even more than I was when I woke up. I started my novel anyway, but it felt a bit lackadaisical, and my poor prologue suffered.

I took a break from writing to do school, chores, and live life. During this time I prayed. Hard. I still got the same sense: I am supposed to do NaNo. It's good for me. I need to write and abandon my inner editor. Or better yet, shove my inner editor into a closet. Either one.

God basically reminded me that if he told me to do this, He'll give me the strength to follow through. I need to remember why I write in the first place. Remember that this is for fun. And best of all, remember to breathe.

Guys, we can do this. Just remember to take some time off. Try to forget about your novel for at least a little while. Spend some time with your family. Watch a movie. Play a video game. Read a book.

And best of all, remember to breathe.

Letters from the NaNo home front: After my initial breakdown, I started chapter one. Getting into my main character Riah's perspective really helped the story flow, and I'm ending the day with 5,000 words, though it took me a while to get there - I've been writing all day! :P What's your current wordcount?

almost there, and i can't wait

2011-10-31T18:49:00.000-07:00

I'm starting to feel the anticipation more than ever for NaNoWriMo. It's going to start tonight, at midnight, and I'm excited. The jury is still out over whether I'll stay up till midnight or wake up early to write. [I'm not sure which method of losing sleep would work better.] Regardless, I can't wait to start.

I've outlined all the way up to chapter 26, and after that I only have a vague idea about what happens.

Crazy, eh? Yeah, I get that a lot.

I can't wait for...

...the chats with friends.
...the writing, of course.
...delving into the plot of my fantasy novel.
...getting to eat, breathe, and sleep my novel for the next 30 days.
...absolute insanity.

Oh, and by the way, after this, my posts may not be as coherent as usual. My brain juices will be focused on NaNo, and I'm embracing the crazy. I'm embracing the challenge... and the adventure. In other words...

I can't wait.

What are you looking forward to about NaNo? [Or if you're not doing NaNo, what are you looking forward to about November?]

Dear Writer

2011-10-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

Dear You,

Yes, I'm talking to you: the hopeful writer. You are so brave to be forging new ideas and thoughts. And yet you're cowering behind your computer screen, afraid to write one word lest it be imperfect.

You think your novel's not good enough?

Think again.

Being a writer is a hard and noble calling. Writing a novel, much less a short story, is not easy.

And you, my friend, have decided to undertake such a heavy task. (Am I boosting your ego yet?)

Yet your road is plagued with self-doubt. My novel isn't good enough. I'm not good enough. These words? Cliche. I am not a writer.

Oh, but you are a writer. Otherwise, we wouldn't be here.

Listen: everyone's first draft stinks. That's just the way it is. Every published novel goes through tons of editing before it is made viewable to the public eye. You can't write a novel the first time around and expect it to be perfect.

In fact, your novel won't even be perfect by the third, fourth, or fifth draft. (If you get that far, I applaud you. I'm sure this day is coming for us, novelists. Prepare yourselves.) I saw Bryan Davis speak once, and he said that your story is never completely finished. You will never have a perfect novel, so why try?

But you can do your best. Do your best to pour every ink-stained word and every drop of sweat into your manuscript. Write the story that you've been called to write. Because I know it, dear writer: you have a story. And it needs to be told.

After all, if you don't tell it, who will?

Love,
-Me

Oh, and P.S. - this letter was written to Me as much as it was written to You. ;)

-----------------------

Update from the NaNo battlefront: Well, I have a villain. Two, in fact. One of them needs a name, though. If you have any names that sound dastardly, cunning, and villainous, leave them in a comment.

I'm also plodding along on my outline, and I'm on Chapter 17. Three days, people. Three days.

Outlining: In Which I Hit A Wall

2011-10-26T11:41:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I was rejoicing because of a new growth in my writing journey. Originally, I had resigned myself to being nothing but a seat-of-the-pants writer for the rest of my life. No planning involved.

NaNo has compelled me to plan. And as such, I'd discovered a new love of outlining.

This new love has been somewhat tainted by the fact that I have hit a wall.

I'm sure you can relate. You're coasting along, loving how your plotting is going, and then suddenly a wall looms up in the path ahead of you, bigger than anything you've ever seen.

You can't go around it. You can't go through it. The only direction to go is... over.

The problem is, you don't know how to get over it.

The wall that I've hit is something you're very familiar with, I'm sure. It's called a villain.

My plot is turning out amazing so far... except for one thing: it's boring. It needs conflict; someone that stands directly in the goal of the main hero. I'm aware of my hero's goals. I'm just not sure how my villain can prevent them. Or really, who is my villain anyway?

Part of the problem may stem from the fact that I'm trying to be original. And the fact is, there are no original ideas - only original ways of writing them.

However, I'm having trouble taking this to heart.

I have a few ideas for my villain, but they're elusive. As soon as I think I've nailed something down, I end up rejecting the idea because of one reason or another. My problem? I think I'm being too perfectionistic, sadly. It's one of my weaknesses as a writer. I want everything to be just right. I want my story to be good enough so that I don't have to edit it later.

Ha!

Moving on.

Then again, part of the problem might be that this is my second day without a shower. We're trying to fix our hot water heater, and I think it's getting to my head. My hair is a literal mess. Time to find a hat, I suppose.

Anyway, I want to hear from you: what are your villains like? Maybe it'll get my brain juices going. Or maybe, it'll just help me to see that maybe writing a villain isn't too hard after all.

Oh, and are you hitting any walls yet? Perhaps your wall looks a little something like this?

Yeah... me too.

different, yet the same

2011-10-25T14:06:00.000-07:00

I'm not a pastor's daughter by any means, but sometimes I wonder if the title couldn't be applied informally. I can't remember a time when my parents weren't reaching out to someone in need. I admire my parents. They do their best to completely open themselves up to God's plan, whatever it may be. They're not perfect, but they don't have to be. The thing about surrender is that God sometimes turns it into His wildest, greatest plans.

Along the way, God drops people into our lap. They need us to speak into their lives in different ways, and it surprises me that we often need them, too.

My heart hurts for these people. Our friends. Broken families. Redeemed situations.

I'm learning that life... isn't perfect. If it was, we wouldn't need heaven. We wouldn't need a hero.

We wouldn't need Jesus.

Still, it hurts. The world hurts. Pain hurts. Life is hard.

We are broken.

And the sad part is, we all think we're alone. We feel isolated, and we've fallen into the trap of believing that no one could possibly understand how we feel. So we coldly trudge along, lost in our insecurities and struggles, traversing a lonely, rocky path that we never would have chosen for ourselves. We believe we are alone.

We are wrong. We are never alone.

'Cuz we could never find our way back home with broken hearts
So love has come to meet us where we are."
- Sing, Josh Wilson

I was pleasantly surprised this week to find out that many people go through the same things I do. Insecurity, depression, fear. This is all a part of being human, traversing this road we call life.

And it's going to be okay.

He is coming soon, He is coming soon
He will take his bride,
He will make her new
He is coming soon, He is coming soon
To carry us home."
-The Saints, Josh Wilson

We are uniquely different, yet the same. Same struggles. Same pain. Same Savior.

We are broken, tossed by the winds. We are bruised, battered, and bleeding. We are beautifully made. We are blessed.

We are different, yet the same.

And we are His.

NaNoWriMo: Are You Freaking Out Yet?

2011-10-24T11:02:00.000-07:00

Every morning this week I've been greeted by a slew of posts about NaNoWriMo on my dashboard. It's thrilling, to be sure.

This is NaNoWriMo, people. It's happening in 7 days.

Seven days?!

I must be crazy.

Oh wait, NaNo is made of crazy.

I actually started doubting my sanity a couple days ago. Really doubting my sanity. Can I handle NaNo? Am I crazy for doing this?

Okay, yes, I am crazy. We've already established that.

Anyway, I'm starting to feel the pre-November crunch. You know... that sinking feeling in your stomach when you realize just what you've gotten yourself into.

What have I gotten myself into, indeed?

I want to do NaNo. I really do. I think it'll be good for me. But those feelings of inadequacy are almost too much.

What if my novel stinks?
{It probably will.}
But I want it to be a good first draft!
{There is no such thing as a good first draft.}
I want my writing to be perfect!
{Silly. Your writing won't be perfect, and neither will you.}

It's the endless struggle of a writer: Inadequacy. Our words aren't good enough... we aren't good enough.

Oh, but we are.

We have to believe it. What we write is worth something. To us. To the world. To God. We're not worthless... and neither are our words.

I want to do NaNo because I need to get over this inadequacy. Writing is not about being perfect, it's about writing. We can strive and strive to make our words perfect the first time around, but in the end, we won't finish what we start. Believe me - I know. The only time I've finished a novel is when I let go of my expectations and decided to write it all down. Everything. No self-censoring. No editing allowed. Just writing, pure and simple.

Yes, there is a certain amount of planning we must do. But I've found that when I plan too much, all the fun will drain right out of it. Then again, if I don't plan at all, then my novel is more disaster-prone. I'm discovering something, though: there are no right or wrong answers. We must write the way we have to write. It's a balance; a limbo of words, planning and editing, painting our souls and telling our tales.

The writing journey can't be described. It's different for each person. So I'm trying to remember this: Write the way that works for me. The most important thing about writing is this:

Write.

After all, that's why we're called writers, isn't it?

{P.S. - I have a couple blog posts in mind that don't have anything to do with NaNoWriMo... so stay tuned.}

Fantasy, Writer's Doubt, and Inspiration

2011-10-23T10:29:00.000-07:00

I've gone through a dry period in my writing lately when it comes to writing fantasy. I don't think I've written fantasy for the past couple of years. Looking back, I wonder why on earth I didn't.

Reese's Pieces was my first novel I finished, but it is certainly not fantasy. It contained a girl, coffee, her family, friends, and life. No swords or castles, definitely. (Also, I need to work on finding a better title for it. :P)

Before that, I had another work-in-progress. When I was 12, I started writing Talryn's Tale and continued it for at least 2 years until I hit a road block. Sadly, I stopped. I still have it in its entirety, but something has been stopping me from writing it. I'm not sure why.

Honestly, I think I didn't write fantasy because I started to doubt myself and my writing. I decided that my writing wasn't good enough to compare to C.S. Lewis or Tolkien. (Yeah, comparing a first draft to a masterpiece that has been edited and published is not a good idea.)

Enter NaNoWriMo this year. I've been thinking about fantasy again, and something stirred in my heart. I decided that, once again, I'd try my hand at fantasy. Just to see if I can.

I'm not sure if it's a mistake or a good idea to attempt a fantasy novel during NaNo. We shall see. But one thing I do know: my characters have been real again, more real than they have been for a long time.

Yes, my characters from Reese's Pieces were real, but there's something different this year. Something I can't quite put my finger on. I guess I'd call it inspiration. There's something more exciting about writing fantasy than anything else. Something exciting about creating your own worlds and molding them into whatever you want. I feel more free in my writing here. I can write freely. Yes, Riah can carry a sword if she wants, and she can also wear sneakers if she likes. There are no constraints.

Fantasy is typically set in a medieval type world. I have no problem with that - so is mine. However, I'm looking to add unique elements to this story, stuff that isn't normally in fantasy novels. I want my novel to be different, in a good way.

A couple of days ago, I was reading over some of my old blog posts at my Wordpress blog, and I came across this one. It was about Talryn and the other characters from that story, and I loved it. They were the backbone of the story, they were vivid, they were different. They were almost real.

I've been plotting my characters the past few days, since they're the most important element of the story, and they're coming alive in a way that hasn't happened since Talryn's Tale. I'm coming up with snappy bits of dialogue, even before I've set pen to paper. The characters are dictating the story. And that's the way I think it should be. Writing a novel is like growing a plant: You have to let it grow.

So, here they are: a few of my characters, complete with dialogue and outfits and personality.

Silver Tears - NaNo 2011

Tell me about your characters now. Are they coming alive yet? How is your inspiration-level this year?

Blog World, Meet My NaNo Novel

2011-10-21T20:51:00.000-07:00

I can officially say without a doubt, that this is my favorite Beautiful People round ever, as evidenced by the fact that I couldn't wait to put this post up. I've enjoyed reading about all your novels, and I'm amazed by how creative we all are! Writers, I think you all deserve a high-five. :)

As for me, here is my contribution to this month's edition of Beautiful People.

1. Sum up your novel in five words or less.
Blacksmith, sister, pain, adventure, hope.

2. Novel title?
Silver Tears

3. Sum up your main character(s) in one word each.
Gavin Gray: Determined. Riah: Forgiven. Torin: Roguish.

4. Advice for newbies in three words?
Don't think. Write.

5. Tell us about your secondary characters, how do they affect the story?
Well, considering one of them falls sick and forces her brother to leave behind everything he holds dear, I'd say that's pretty significant, don't you?

6. Do you plan to stay up till midnight on the 31st?
Hmmm... possibly. I'd like to, but it's a school night and when I stay up, I'm usually not good for much the next day. So we'll have to see.

7. How many years have you done NaNo?
Technically, three, but the first year I didn't win. Well, I did win, but I did the YWP (Young Writer's Program). I aimed for 25k, and ended up with 30k, so it was a good year.

Last year I started out with the YWP program, and ended up hitting 50k in the last week by writing 25k in a few days. It was... um, crazy to say the least. I'd rather not repeat that incident, which is why I'm planning ahead this year. :P

8. What came first, characters, or plot idea?
Let's see. Characters... definitely characters. In fact, I had Gavin Gray long before I ever came up with the plot idea. You may have heard of him before, actually... here and here.

As for Chasiel and Torin, they have been around for years, it seems. I came up with Chasiel by stealing the name from Georgie, who has since discarded it, and she helped me come up with the name Torin as well. They're related, and Torin adores Chasiel like a sister.

My characters helped determine the plot idea, and I'm actually amazed that I have a full, mostly developed plot. Wonder of wonders!

9. How much prep do you do before November?
A moderate amount. This year my goal is to keep my plot structured, but have a little elbow room to be creative. I've outlined my prologue and first chapter so far, and I have 10 days to outline the rest. Wish me luck.

10. Now be honest, how do you really feel about NaNo?
Nervous, excited, terrified, and full of anticipation. In other words, I just summed up the entire NaNo experience.

What about you? Have you joined Beautiful People yet? Are you doing NaNo? If you answered yes to either of these questions, click here to get started.

And I'd love to hear your thoughts. Comments are what make the world go 'round... or is it dark chocolate? O.o

Beautiful People - NaNoWriMo Edition

2011-10-20T17:01:00.000-07:00

Hello, writers! Welcome to November's edition of Beautiful People, which is geared around NaNoWriMo. Can you believe we'll be breaking out our Word documents, pencils, and coffee in eleven days? Neither can I. Hopefully, this Beautiful People edition will make you even more excited about it than you were before.

(For those who don't know what Beautiful People is, check out this post, and also the FAQ.)

If you're not doing NaNo, then you can still participate! You can either answer the following questions about your current novel. Or, there is another option, if you are ready for a challenge.

NaNoers, listen up too. We'd like to challenge all of you to... well, a challenge. As evidenced by this blog thing, asking questions about your characters helps you get to know them. So, if you need to figure out what goes on inside your character's brain, we have a treasury of questions. This is a complete archive of all the BP questions, from March until now, and we'd like to challenge you to answer them about your main character this month. All of them.

Are you feeling brave? I hope so. ;) Whether you do it on your blog or just for yourself, we hope it'll help you get a better grasp of the way your main character's mind works. This is an optional challenge, but if you're feeling up to it, click HERE to go to the official BP archives.

However, if you're just looking to answer ten questions like you normally do, then be my guest. Here is this month's round, courtesy of Georgie and I. ;)

Sum up your novel in five words or less.
Novel title?
Sum up your main character(s) in one word each.
Advice for newbies in three words?
Tell us about your secondary characters, how do they affect the story?
Do you plan to stay up till midnight on the 31st?
How many years have you done NaNo?
What came first, characters, or plot idea?
How much prep do you do before November?
Now be honest, how do you really feel about NaNo?

Don't forget to sign the linky, and have fun! :)

P.S. - thanks to all who voted on the poll, telling me what you think about my design. 12 people (66%) LOVED it, and 6 people (33%) liked the other template better. I appreciated your feedback, and maybe my old design will make a reappearance in the near future. ;)

I have a new poll up, so do check it out. :)

fearless, pt. 2

2011-10-19T12:18:00.000-07:00

{follow-up to this post.}

I've been realizing something since my post about being fearless. We don't need to be fearless as much as we need to choose not to fear. There's a difference, believe it or not. We will still have fears, but it matters what we choose to do with them. Choosing not to be fearful is vital.

And it's also very, very hard.

Bravery is a lost art, it seems. It's hard to be courageous. Fear pushes its way in, suffocating us. Paralyzing us. It makes us too afraid to do anything, much less fulfill God's plan for us. We're bound up in ropes of insecurity, anxiety, panic... and fear.

There seems to be no way out. But there is. It's called the Truth.

It's not that obvious, really. The easy way out is to keep struggling, trying to find a way out on our own. But we can't make it out on our own. We need help. We need Jesus. He is the Truth.

You'd be amazed how free I feel when I speak truth to the lies that bind me. I am a redeemed child of God. I am free. I am beautiful. I am loved. I have a hope and a future. I am His.

We have a choice to make. It's a constant, mental decision. Everyday... every waking moment. Will we fear, or will we trust? Will we believe God's words, or Satan's lies? Because that's all they are. Lies.

I can't do this on my own. I need Jesus. I need the Truth.

{I know this post could be considered a bit redundant, but it's something I needed to say, more for my sake than anyone else's. Thanks for reading! :) }

P. S. - check back tomorrow for our NaNoWriMo edition of Beautiful People! :D

Ordinary Heroes

2011-10-15T23:06:00.000-07:00

It's midnight, and I just got done watching the movie Unstoppable. Basically, it's about a train... that is unstoppable. It was my first real suspense movie.

It's midnight, and I should be sleeping, but I'm too excited to sleep. There's something about the adrenaline rush; the feeling you get when you see ordinary people do heroic things. I want to write something just as amazing, a story about someone who does something heroic.

You get all stressed over the outcome. Will they win? Will they lose? Who will live? Who will die?

And then the end comes. And you are completely, utterly satisfied.

Ordinary people doing heroic things. That's the kind of person I want to be.

In Which I Copy & Paste... A Lot

2011-10-13T18:18:00.000-07:00

If you use a blog reader, you may be confused with all these new/old posts appearing from 2006. No worries; you haven't gone back in time - I've just been moving over old blog posts to my blog.

As some of you may know, I started out blogging at an old site called Homeschoolblogger. (You can find my original blog here.) Since then, I've hopped around to Wordpress, then to Blogger, then to HSB, then back to Blogger again - and I'm here to stay. So I'll be moving over all my old posts, and you can find them under the label HSB.

Just be forewarned: I use exclamation points. A lot!!!!!!!!!

Oi. It must be getting to my brain.

Anyway, I'm thankful for my blogging journey; the ups and downs. I've loved chronicling my life like this, and I've laughed several times reading notes from my 10-year-old self! It's these kind of things that make blogging worth it, and I'm thankful.

What about you? What makes blogging worth it?

Five Reasons Why I Love NaNoWriMo

2011-10-11T11:08:00.000-07:00

NaNoWriMo. It stands for National Novel Writing Month. The idea is simple: write a novel in 30 days. Doing it, however, is another matter entirely.

Yet in spite of the challenge, I enjoy it, and here are five reasons why.

Word wars. Seriously, is there anything greater? The concept is that you'll be forced to battle against a friend (or two... or three) to see who can write the most words in a set amount of time. And let me tell ya - you will be compelled to just write. I don't think there's anything more crazy. Or more fun.
Writing. Well, NaNoWriMo is about writing, and guess what? By the time November is over, you will have written a novel. And that's a good thing.
Friendship. There's something about writing a novel in 30 days that encourages camaraderie. Or insanity. Or both.
Insanity. That seems like a good one to mention. Take it from the girl who wrote 25k in 5 days - it's insane. But it's also possible. And by the time you're done writing, you will feel accomplished. Be amazed at what you've done... and try not to think about how bad your novel actually is.
Skills. Yes, NaNo is fun, but it also teaches you something. It teaches you how to finish what you start. It teaches you how to let go and just write. Most of all, it teaches you how fun writing can be... and how vital sleep really is.

Yes, NaNo is hard, and yes, you will write absolute rubbish. But that's the point of it. You can't be a writer unless you write.

So write.

And make us all a pot of coffee while you're at it.

to be fearless

2011-10-10T18:06:00.000-07:00

I have some friends that really like Taylor Swift. And then some of my other friends aren't really fond of her music.

As for me, I remain kind of indifferent. I don't listen to country music a whole lot, but there are a couple songs or singers that catch my attention. (Josh Turner would be one example of this.)

I've listened to a little bit of Taylor's stuff and actually really liked it. My favorites are Love Story and You Belong With Me - because who doesn't love two songs about Romeo and Juliet, cheerleaders, and nerds?

But I digress. Whether you like Taylor Swift's music or not, I think she has gotten one thing completely right.

Fearless.

What comes to mind when you read that word? Taylor? That's right, it's one of her albums. I think it's one of the best album titles I've ever heard. Just that one word evokes so many vivid images.

Falling off a cliff into the unknown.
Diving deep into the lakes of Elyon.
Living life in vivid, passionate brushstrokes, engulfing your empty canvas in bright colors.
Throwing off the chains of sin and Satan and legalism... to be free.

Freedom.

Could it be that the words fearless and freedom are synonymous?

And then there is the opposite: Fear. It binds us - in so many ways and on so many levels. It shrouds our world in darkness, blinding us. It blinds and it binds. It leaves us believing there is no way out.

But the truth shall set you free...

Truth. It breaks down the walls and the lies. Fear is nothing but a lie. Satan wants us to get wrapped up in fear because when we fear, we are useless. We are trapped in our own walls of anxiety, unable to break down the door.

And then, there was light...

Jesus.
The way, the truth, and the life. He did not come to give us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love, and a sound mind.

WHY are we so afraid? Afraid of what people think of us. Afraid of what God thinks of us. Afraid of His plan. Afraid that He's not strong enough. (Believe me, I'm preaching to the choir.)

Life is not about rules, fear, regulations, or laws. It's about Jesus.
Sweet Jesus.
He empowers us to be free.
With him, we can do all things...

Plunge off that cliff, wherever He's leading us.
Dive deep.
Paint from the depths of our soul.
Throw off the chains.
Be free.

To be free is my greatest wish.

Because to be free is to be fearless.

Beautiful People: Torin

2011-10-04T21:16:00.000-07:00

So, it's time for Beautiful People, and this time I'm not posting it way late. Last time around, I accidentally posted my BP post a day before the next month's version came out. Oops.

Ahem. Carrying on.

This character is in the plot that will tentatively be my NaNo plot. His name... is Torin.

1. Do they have any habits, annoying or otherwise?
Torin has a very roguish, rebellious personality. So, depending on your view of such characters, he could be endearing. On the other hand, certain habits of his will be annoying whether they're meant to be or not. In fact, you're apt to be annoyed with Torin himself.

However, he does have a few habits in particular that can definitely be classified as annoying. The biggest one is cracking his knuckles. The second is the way he manages to defy authority in pretty much everything, and is very willing to debate his point of view. You could see the latter as both a strength and a weakness, I suppose.

2. What is their backstory and how does it affect them now?
This is all very tentative information, but here goes.

Have I mentioned how hard it is to write backstory?

Sigh.

About an hour later, after procrastinating, writing a bit, and then playing Clue, I have written out a full paragraph. The best part is, BP has helped me come up with a backstory... and a plot! Hooray!

So here is the short version of the story... and the most vague.
The King of {Insert The Name Of Their Country Here} had a brother, and Torin is the son of that brother. Shortly after Torin was born, his parents mysteriously disappeared, and were never seen again. The cause behind this is unknown, but Torin believes that the King was responsible for this somehow and had his parents killed on purpose. Because of this, he has always resented his adoptive father. He tries not to show it, however, because he's convinced that he'll inherit the throne.

3. How do they show love?
Love? Ha!

Just kidding.

Believe it or not, there are a select few people that Torin loves. However, he's not very good at showing it... but he tries.

If Torin loves you, he will most likely:
A: Respect you. Mostly.
B: Give you flowers... maybe. If he can find them. And if you appreciate flowers. Preferably if you're a girl. Like his sister-formerly-cousin, Chasiel. Okay, okay. He only gives flowers to her.
C: Smile. Possibly. If he feels like it.

4. How competitive are they?
Let's just say it's not a pretty picture at all when Torin loses.

5. What do they think about when nothing else is going on?
He's always wondered what happens when people die, or if there's an afterlife - this is largely brought on by wondering about his parents and what really happened to them. He thinks about sword-fighting, one of his favorite things. He also ponders what will be for dinner that night, and whether Chasiel will force him to take a bath.

6. Do they have an accent?
Depends. Do you?

I didn't think so.

He either has a British accent or an American one. The verdict is still undecided.

7. What is their station in life?
He is a prince, unfortunately, and he resents it and loves it all at the same time.

8. What do others expect from them?
His father expects him to behave. The world expects him to behave in a princely fashion. And Chasiel expects him to change his attitude and keep his room clean.

9. Where were they born, and when?
He was born in a {City Whose Name Is Yet To Be Determined} in a {Nameless Country} in a certain year that isn't set in stone yet. Isn't that so amazingly clear?

10. How do they feel about people in general?
He likes them. Kinda. If you like him, then at least he'll try to be civil to you.
...Maybe.

P.S. - if you'd like to join Beautiful People and haven't yet, click here for our latest round of questions!

Blessed

2011-10-03T19:55:00.000-07:00

"Don't give up! God is still in the business of blessing His children."
-Sandra Byrd

It's been one of those weeks.

The ironic part is that it's barely even started yet. So, I guess I should just say it's been a harder day. Parts of it were amazing, and parts of it were hard. But I guess that's life, eh?

I really don't want to seem like I'm complaining - I'm just being honest. Life is hard... but it's also good.

In the midst of my morning routine, I checked my email and saw this article sent to me by my grandma. The quote really struck me. God is still in the business of blessing His children.

No, life is not perfect. Yes, life is hard.

But God loves His children. And even better than that, He loves blessing them.

He loves blessing us. In everything we do. Sometimes the blessings are little ones that we don't even see. Sometimes they're big ones. But all the while, He is blessing us.

It makes me excited to see how He blesses me. I don't know when He will, or how he will. But I do know one thing: He will.

If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! -Matthew 7:11

So, as hard as it is, I'm trying to be thankful for the good... and yes, even for the bad. As one of my dear friends says, "Glory in the struggles. We wouldn't grow without them." This is something I'm still working on. ;)

Could it be that our lives would be easier if we saw our struggles as a blessing?

It's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive.
-Relient K

i don't need a telescope

2011-09-30T11:56:00.000-07:00

ever since i posted my last post, i've been struggling to write. go figure, eh? writing suddenly became challenging for me, and i'm wondering if i'm even ready to write this story yet. so i've been dabbling in other writings, and working on other things, and working on high school biology. the last one in and of itself has been challenging.

as of tomorrow, it's a month until nanowrimo. i'm still trying to figure out what i'm going to write. oh dear. we'll see how this goes.

life has been so busy. there are so many good blogposts i want to write; inspiring blog posts that encourage my creative side. i have all these ideas while i'm trying to fall asleep, and then when i wake up i don't remember them. so this blog post, i hope, will make up for the lack of blog posts. sometimes i just have to let it go, write in lowercase, and ramble.

my laptop also broke again, after just getting it back from the repair shop. apparently the first repair wasn't successful, so back to the computer shop it went. this means i do not have access to my adobe photoshop, and my creative-graphics side is suffering. this is rather frustrating, but at least i haven't been wasting time making avatars when i could be doing other things. it's a win-win situation... i guess. :p

hey, look - it's wall-e!

i've been anxious lately, over trivial things, and trying not to be. unfortunately, it doesn't work to try not to be anxious. i think i'm mostly over it now. ha... emphasis on the word mostly. still, i'm learning that i don't need to be afraid. i don't need to be afraid of making the wrong choices, or of failing. i don't need to be afraid of... well, anything.

however, putting this into practice is easier said than done.

i don't need a telescope to see that there's hopeand that makes me feel brave.-owl city

i've been wondering what would happen in the blog-world if we dropped our masks and posted from our heart. i guess this is what i'm trying to do right now. it kind of helps when i can't even think straight. :P chronic pain can do that to a person. someday, i'll write a post about headaches and chronic pain and all that comes with it. but for now, i'm in too much pain. haha, isn't that so ironic?

note to self: headbanging is not a good activity to engage in when you already suffer from headaches. i have a really bad headache now, unfortunately.

that is all.

Bottles

2011-09-23T21:46:00.000-07:00

You've heard about Avary. Probably more than you've ever wanted to. She's the one who started Beautiful People, because you asked me questions about her. And slowly, she started to become a story.

I've tried multiple times to start this story, but every time it didn't feel right. Until tonight.

Tonight, inspiration hit in the form of 965 words. Almost 2 years ago, it hit in the form of a dream. And tonight, I started my novel.

I started writing about bottles, and the words came from there. Avary slowly became a reality, and her story is soon to follow.

I'm feeling both trepidation and excitement. I've never began a project this big. This is something I've spent blood, sweat, and tears over.

And now it's become a reality.

I'm not sure where this novel will take me or what will happen. But I'm excited.

I'll spare you a remark about how this is just the "first step in the journey" or something like that. Instead, I'm just going to ask if you could pray for me. I want God to guide this story, and I think He already is.

It's going to be interesting, but worth it. I can't wait to send my message in a bottle.

Beautiful People - September

2011-09-20T16:53:00.000-07:00

As Georgie said in her BP post, I feel like I just did Beautiful People.

Oh wait... I did. :P

If you don't know what Beautiful People is, I'd highly suggest looking at this post. You're welcome to join us at any time and use whichever edition of questions you'd like. Also, if you have any ideas for questions we could use in the future, feel free to comment on either Georgie's or my post.

And here are this month's questions! Thanks to MeganEmma for submitting a question to this round. :)

1. Do they have any habits, annoying or otherwise?
2. What is their backstory and how does it affect them now?
3. How do they show love?
4. How competitive are they?
5. What do they think about when nothing else is going on?
6. Do they have an accent?
7. What is their station in life?
8. What do others expect from them?
9. Where were they born, and when?
10. How do they feel about people in general?

Don't forget to sign the linky below, and have fun!

Beautiful People: Gesparo

2011-09-19T20:19:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the delay in this post! I've been under the weather - literally - with a head cold and some achiness, plus good ol' procrastination.

Anyway, today I'd like to introduce the villain of Avary's story. His name is Gesparo, and he's my first "real" villain. Prepare to be amazed.

What is their biggest accomplishment? His biggest accomplishment is overcoming the challenges of his childhood, namely being abandoned by his mother, and becoming the person he is today. Oh, and getting out of jail was a plus, too.
What is one of their strongest childhood memories? He has lots. Gesparo's childhood was easily the hardest part of his life, and the most memorable. He was abandoned on the streets by his mother when he was seven, and he spent his time drifting from planet to planet, in an empty effort to find his true home.
What is their favorite food? Escargot. (And no, I've never eaten it.)
Do they believe in love at first sight? Gespardo? Ha! No. He doesn't believe in love at all... at least, that's what he'd like you to believe.
What kind of home do they live in? A cave! Dark, dim, and dank. It's his evil LAIR. ... Okay, that's not true. He lives in an average-size house, something that you'd never suspect was hiding the greatest villain of the century.
What do they like to wear? Clothes.
What would they do if they discovered they were dying? He'd probably give up his current plan and turn to a plan that was faster and more effective. Like, explosives. That way he'd be able to take revenge on the world before he died.
What kind of holidays, or traditions do they celebrate? His birthday. Other than that, not much.
What do your other characters have to say about them? Well, considering he's the villain, the other characters aren't so fond of him... except for one person. Brian has actually looked past all the grime and evilness on the outside and seen the good part of Gesparo: his inner child.
If they could change one thing in their world, what would it be? He would make it easier to control the things that happen to him, like pain and struggles. In fact, he'd eliminate them all together. Either that, or make the world suffer instead of him. Sounds like a happy guy, eh?

If you would like to participate this month's Beautiful People, click here! September's BP post will becoming up really soon. :)

what is grace?

2011-09-14T21:23:00.000-07:00

Have some of you noticed that we are not yet perfect? (No great surprise, right?) And are you ready to make the accusation that since people like me, who go through Christ in order to get things right with God, aren't perfectly virtuous, Christ must therefore be an accessory to sin? The accusation is frivolous. If I was "trying to be good," I would be rebuilding the same old barn that I tore down. I would be acting as a charlatan.

What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn't work. So I quit being a "law man" so that I could be God's man. Christ's life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine," but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that.

Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God's grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily.

--Galatians 2:17-21

Oops.

2011-09-12T21:55:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry. It appears I left my blogger friends in the dust.

This is what has elapsed in the time that I haven't posted. Well, actually this is more recent. As in, the past week. Does that still count?

My laptop was repaired. Happiness.
I have made about 16+ avatars in the past three days upon getting my laptop fixed; thus being reunited with Photoshop once again.
I started biology.
I came up with a novel idea. Literally.
Life has been interesting.
I got a Photobucket account.
I've been writing. Er, trying to write. But really, I've just been procrastinating.
I split a pack of Owl City t-shirts between me and two other friends.
I bought a Josh Wilson CD, along with a book called Jesus Calling. And a journal. All three of which have been very instrumental in my spiritual walk.
I wore my Converse for the first time since before summer started. ♥
I've learned that it's okay to be imperfect. I'm still learning.
God loves me.
Oh, and I got the new Blogger interface. I like it so far, to be honest.
I realized I still need to do Beautiful People.
Fifteen is a good number to end on, don't you think?

Anyway, how's your life?

Keep Calm And... Call Batman?

2011-08-29T20:10:00.000-07:00

The place? Last night. The time? One in the morning. I was trying to get myself off to the land of dreams, and it wasn't happening.

You know that place in between asleep and awake?

I'm in that place.

It's dark, and quiet. I'm on a walk with a guy that apparently means a great deal to me. It's late evening, and we're in some magical place I didn't even know existed. There are lights hung all around, that reflect in a beautiful fountain spraying water everywhere.

It's beautiful.

And then I look down at my clothes.

And promptly burst out laughing.

It must've been dark when I got dressed this morning. Or else I have short term amnesia and have no recollection of putting this on. Whatever it is, I'm wearing a rather amusing outfit. A bright yellow tee sporting the words, "Keep Calm and Call Batman."

Keep Calm and Call Batman?

Why?

It's paired with gray skinny jeans, a black tank, and yellow flats. A pink flower is in my hair.

Well, this outfit looks pretty awesome if I do say so myself.

keep calm and... call batman? by mountainfireflower featuring butterfly earrings

I don't know where I get this stuff.

We had a magical walk, and I don't know for sure, but it might have ended with splashing in the fountain. At any rate, I've always wanted to splash in a fountain, whether I'm wearing a Batman t-shirt or not.

This dream launched me into sleep. And when I woke up, I made it into a Polyvore set.

I really want a Batman t-shirt now, just so I can wear it on a magical walk by a fountain. And of course, if anything goes wrong, I know exactly what to do.

Keep calm. And call Batman.

please tell me there's a repeat button on youtube.

2011-08-27T21:19:00.000-07:00

i can't stop listening to: This song. 34 seconds of amazingness.

I've never heard of He Is We before. Until this song. I think I might just have to buy it.

Draftless

2011-08-23T14:00:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here listening to The Saltwater Room by Owl City. What a beautiful, contemplative song.

"We'll turn out all of the lights and set this ballroom aglow."

I've never been to a ball. I don't even know how to dance. I've never worn an honest-to-goodness formal dress. The closest I got was wearing a flower girl dress in my aunt's cowboy-themed wedding. My sparkly cowboy boots were cool, I'll admit, but I can't imagine twirling in a ballroom with them.

I wish I could dance. Sometimes I don't feel graceful enough. I've been taught the basics of waltzing, but I trip over my own feet. And whenever I try, I feel like a klutz. It's kind of awkward to try to dance without a partner, though.

I wish I could walk along the shoreline and inhale the misty breeze. I wish I could touch the stars. I wish I could dance.

Now The Tip of the Iceberg just came on. I want to wear a warm fuzzy sweater now, if only it wasn't sweltering heat outside. I like snow, I really do, but my chronic pain reacts to the weather and I'm not sure if I'm ready for another couple months of storms.

And then I think about what a messed up jumble of a post this is, and I wonder if it's even worth it to hit publish. I second-guess myself in my writing all the time. And don't even talk to me about editing. I don't like it. At all.

I was just tempted to stop and hit the preview button, since that's what I do all the time when I write up blog posts. But I stopped myself. Hooray.

Writing draftless like this makes me feel more contemplative and down than I really should be. I mean, I have lots to be thankful for! I don't know why this post is turning out melancholy.

Okay, I'm going to turn on a different song now. What about Hot Air Balloon?

That's a little better.

Someday, it's on my bucket list to ride in a hot air balloon. I'm afraid of heights in some ways, so I'm not sure how I'd do millions of feet above the ground. (That is an exaggeration, by the way.) But at the same time, it would be so cool to look down on the world below and see the way it forms a patchwork quilt.

So, I guess the moral of this blog post is:

1. I don't know how to dance.

2. I'm sorta-kinda looking forward to winter.

3. I would love to ride in a hot air balloon.

"You made my frown turn upside down, and now my worries are gone."

This post was written freely, as I tried not to stop and just write the thoughts on my brain. This post was written draftless.

Join the Draftless challenge @ Dramatic Elegance.

Beautiful People - August Edition

2011-08-22T20:39:00.000-07:00

What is Beautiful People, you may ask?

Beautiful People is an epic tale of right and wrong, death and life, light and darkness. It's the story of how long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, aliens decided to snuff the life out of the world, and how one brave little toaster saved the world. Don't worry, this is not your average story about a talking toaster, it's more than that. We're just trying to figure out what it is, though. Prepare to be amazed, encouraged, uplifted, inspired, and cheered up, because this is a story to remember. I think.

I'm juuust kidding.

Beautiful People is a blog thing for writers that was started by Georgie Penn and I. We realized that the best way to get to know your characters is to ask questions about them, and we wanted to share this joy with the blog world. You're welcome to join in at any time and use however many of the questions that you wish, past or present. Some of these questions may be a bit hard to answer, but embrace the challenge and go for it!

You can find the handy little blog buttons here, so don't forget to link back and sign the linky!

This month's questions were submitted by Taylor Lynn. Thank you!

Writers, here is your assignment. ;)

What is their biggest accomplishment?
What is one of their strongest childhood memories?
What is their favorite food?
Do they believe in love at first sight?
What kind of home do they live in?
What do they like to wear?
What would they do if they discovered they were dying?
What kind of holidays, or traditions do they celebrate?
What do your other characters have to say about them?
If they could change one thing in their world, what would it be?

Coincidence? I think not!

2011-08-22T11:17:00.000-07:00

If you listen to Owl City's songs Dental Care and Rugs From Me To You, you'll know that he loves puns and other such wordplays. He also is on Twitter. So it was that I came up with a clever pun and tweeted it to him. (I must say that the mustache bit isn't original, but it's still funny.) I got off shortly after and honestly didn't think anything would come of it.

(@vivid_writer is my public account I use to reply to people who aren't following me.
I'd use @lovehascome, but my tweets are locked down and I like it that way.)

However, something did come of it.

I got on after my mom and I finished watching Dr. Quinn and absentmindedly checked my Twitter, only to see a tweet from Owl City. He didn't reply to me, but he tweeted this to EVERYONE.

Somewhere along the line, he must have read my tweet.

I refuse to believe that this is coincidental.

Thank you, Owl City. You made my day.

I Am

2011-08-19T18:47:00.000-07:00

Close your eyes and imagine with me for a moment. (Well, closing your eyes could be a bit difficult while you read this, but bear with me.)

Imagine you’re in a ballroom. The decadence is overwhelming. Glowing light is cast over everything as the band plays soft, serenading music in the background. You’re a bit of a wallflower, but you don’t mind. You’re enjoying watching everyone twirl and dance, so much so that you don’t even care that you’re not waltzing with the rest of them. Your soft purple dress falls around you in graceful folds, and your hair is in a curly updo. You wouldn’t even know how to do your hair like that if this was real life. You see diamonds everywhere - in the chandeliers above your head, in the dangly earrings you wear, and the diamond bracelet on your wrist. The sparkly atmosphere makes it feel all the more magical.

You feel a light tap on your shoulder. “May I have this dance?”

You whirl, suddenly brought out of your reverie. You were so lost in thought that you didn’t see this man approach, but now, here he stands. His hair is in sawdust-colored curls, and he bows slightly. A hint of a smile lingers on his lips. You’re not sure whether to feel afraid or excited at this unexpected turn of events.

You take his outstretched hand as he leads you onto the dance floor. He grasps your hand, and you waltz. Twirling, twirling. You study this mysterious stranger as you dance. Who is he? Where did he come from?

“I believe we were never fully introduced,” you begin.

“I’m sorry.” He smiles, almost mischievously. He doesn’t give you his name, and seems to have no intention of giving it to you. You wait for a few awkward moments, and then you tell him your name. “I know,” he says with a wink.

You can’t think of anything to say, so you keep your mouth shut as the dance continues and finally draws to a close. You stand still as the music fades away, suddenly struck with the realization that you danced with someone who is a complete stranger and seems to want to remain that way. Far be it from you to drag information out of him, but there’s something about him that makes you want to know everything. Maybe it’s the way he smiles... or his bluish-green eyes. Whatever it is, you’re intrigued. And you don’t want this conversation - or, rather, lack of one - to end.

Much to your surprise, it doesn’t. He keeps his hold on your hand and tips his head as he looks at you. “Walk with me?”

You are much too surprised to refuse, and allow him to lead you off the dance floor. Together, you walk out the large double doors onto a balcony that looks just like it came from a Disney princess movie. The stars seem to sing above the two of you, accompanied by the sound of the crickets in the bushes below. You study this man curiously. “Who are you?” You finally ask.

“I am,” he simply says.

“No, I mean... who are you?” you ask again, bewildered.

“Tell me...” He begins, leading you by the hand to a nearby bench. “What’s been troubling you? Your thoughts? Your desires?”

You are speechless. “Um...” Again, you ask yourself, who is he? Why does he seem so familiar? And what is this strange hold he seems to have on your heart?

He just looks at you, imploring you to speak with those beautiful eyes of his. And so you do.

“I’ve been thinking. About God. About life. About me...” You trail off. “Who I’m going to marry, mostly.”

He raises his eyebrows, inviting you to go on. “Yes?”

“No, it’s stupid.” You hang your head. He reaches over and lifts your chin up, and you find yourself looking straight into his eyes. “It’s not stupid,” he whispers. “Not to me.”

Your eyes fill with tears. “I feel... worthless. There are no guys who want to date me. No one to even give me a second glance.”

You turn your body away, but he comes around and kneels in front of you. There is no escaping this man. He holds both your hands in his warm grasp. “What about me?” he asks.

“What about you?” You repeat, starting to get irritated. “I don’t even know who you are!”

“I am,” he says simply.

“You are what?” Your eyes fill with tears again, this time angry tears. You don’t understand this man or anything he says.

Then he says your name. So tenderly. So sweetly. The sound is so beautiful that you want to melt. Slowly, you turn towards him again. “Yes?” you reply.

“Talk to me,” he says.

And for some reason you can’t understand, your heart comes spilling out. All your desires. Your wants. Your needs. Your pain. Your fears. Your hopes. Your dreams.

“And while I have your attention,” you say with a laugh, “I just want to say, I want to know... where is that special guy? Why hasn’t he come yet?”

This man across from you feels like one of your best friends. And in this moment, all he does is blink. So you continue.

“Who is my true love?”

The man stands, and pulls you into his arms. Then he laughs softly. “Well, that’s easy.”

He pauses, and you look up into his eyes. His eyes... you nearly drown in them.

His voice rumbles next to your ear, and you will never forget what he says.

“I am.”

Check this post out @ Beautiful in Christ, and just know this: YOU are beautiful. Because Jesus says so.

I'm also guest posting at Hannah Grace's blog today, so go ahead and check it out here!

Awkwardly Awesome, Part Three

2011-08-18T15:16:00.000-07:00

[part 1 & part 2.]

Awkward:

- Accidentally locking your biology book in a filing cabinet the day before you have to start reading it. Oops.

- Trivia sessions with the family.

- Being bugged to post on your blog and realizing how long it's been since you've done so.

- Falling asleep listening to your mp3 player, then waking up to find out you've lost it. (Yes, this happened to me today.)

- Being so involved in writing this blog post and also listening to Celtic music that you didn't hear your parents calling you.

- Wearing the same pair of jean shorts over and over. (It's summer. What can I say?)

- Going to a mall in a richer part of town and acting like gawky tourists.

- Realizing it's been about three or four months since you watched a Robin Hood episode.

- Subsequently realizing that you forgot to finish the Merlin episode you started three weeks ago.

- Dreaming about Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman and coming up with an entire episode in your dream that never happened.

- Deciding to write said episode down and then failing miserably at making your script sound legitimate.

- Feeding your pet fish peas just so he won't get bloated. (The peas make him not get constipated, if you get my drift.)

- Will Scarlett.

Awesome:

- Listening to Owl City's song To the Sky on repeat.

- Doing the same thing as the above with his song If My Heart Was a House.

- Toupee or not toupee? That is the question.

- Realizing that you can, after all, fit your hair into a ponytail.

- Watching Voyage of the Dawn Treader with your little sister.

- Plaid shirts. And Converse.

- Blue skies.

- Hearing from friends that you haven't heard from in a while.

- Being alive.

- Feather earrings.

- Finally getting caught up on your biology that you missed while you were waiting for the filing cabinet to be unlocked.

- Inspiring Celtic music.

- Coming up with ideas for your very first villain: Gesparo.

- Italian names.

- Writing like crazy with Ashley.

- Will Scarlett.

- Jesus.

Blue Moon Writing Projects (And A Few Current Ones, Too.)

2011-08-09T19:55:00.000-07:00

I've been reading this writer's challenge on a bunch of other blogs, and it looked like way too much fun for me not to join in. :) Yep, I'm coming into this challenge 9 days too late. However, I'm coming in fashionably late, and that's what counts. This challenge is hosted by Lèrowen over at Eat... Sleep... Write, so do join in if you feel so inclined!

Today's question is, what's my current writing project? Well, I'll try to answer this question as best I can.

I have numerous projects. Some of them are nameless, some of them are not. Some of them are worked on 24/7, and some of them are worked on every once in a blue moon. You can read about most of these on my Current Writing Projects page, though sadly, those end up being more 'blue moon projects' than anything else.

My writing projects fluctuate due to how much time I have and how much interest I have in that particular story, but I can certainly tell you what I'm working on right at this very moment.

Currently, my biggest project is Avary's story, which is currently bereft of a title. My poor little novels rarely receive their rightful names until they're already mostly grown-up. Until then, I usually refer to them by the names of their characters, as is the case with this one. As you may already know, I have a full outline, mostly, but still several plotholes. Right now I'm working on figuring out character arcs and an overall theme for the story. Fun stuff. :P

Secondly, I usually always have to have a less-serious work in progress going on as I write my more 'meaty' novels - i.e., the ones that actually have a plot. These side projects are usually my brain-novels, the ones that I spill the contents of my brain onto whether they like it or not. My motto for these is, "just write," and as it so happens, these novels usually end up being finished before any of the others, whereas the ones that actually have a plot sit on my shelf for a while. To this day, the one novel that I've finished is really not all that great (you all know it as Reese's Pieces). Yet I have accomplished with it something I haven't accomplished with anything else: I finished it because I wasn't worried about what I was writing. That's what I get for actually trying to write a good novel. *sigh*

Anyway, that brings me to my second current project. It is also nameless, but has been christened "My Keni Story" for reasons I do not know. (In other words, my main character is named Keni, and it stuck. :P) It was based off of a strange dream I had that I turned into a novel. I have no idea where I'm going with it, but I have only the best hopes and plans for the future. I'll give you a hint: it has to do with guitars, Wal-Mart, and Wisconsin.

And then I have my co-writing projects, which take up a category all of their own. One of my greatest joys is to co-write. I talk a lot about it on my blog, so you may already know that I have written a script with my friend Pip, and four novels going on five with my friend Ashley. However, those are all finished, and only mere reminders of the past.

To start off with, I must tell you about one of my blue moon projects called His Messengers, which I am writing with my Pip. You can read a complete synopsis on the Current Writing Projects page, along with my other blue moon projects (oh, my poor novels). Anyway, it's a really beautiful story about Kearan, Elena, and their good friend Jesse, and what happens to them in their magical land of... what was it called again? Ah, man, I really want to get back to writing that story. (Hint, hint.)

Currently, I'm working on a book called Amira with my friend, Hannah Grace. This novel has been in the works for about one or two years now, and we only just started writing it this summer. It's the story of two girls and the magical world they discover - or, rather, dream up. And then there's Justin... and Renna... and Caius... and Fynn... ♥ Ah, you'll just have to read about it for yourself. {Link to the official Amira blog.}

In addition to that, Ashley and I are working on Will and Elle, which is our latest story we've become inspired for. It's about William Farris and Elle Moser, who are best friends and have to deal with being apart when they both go to college. (Our poor characters.) We talk about that a LOT on our blog, too - Ashen Sky Life.

But! This is not a shameless advertisement for my other writing blogs (okay, well, it is, but it wasn't meant to be). I want to hear about your projects! Do tell... tell all.

Beautiful People: Brian & Violet McGuire

2011-08-07T14:30:00.000-07:00

Today, I'd like to bring to you TWO very beautiful people: Brian and Violet McGuire. They are a brother sister duo who live together on the planet of Emasis. They are in the story about Avary, and are two of the other main characters.

Speaking of Avary's story, I had a good chat with my Pip the other day, who helped me work out some kinks, and then later that night at 1 am came up with a full outline. This novel is coming along and I absolutely can't wait to write it. You'll be getting to hear more about this story and its characters over the next couple of months, starting with Violet and Brian. :)

[you and me] by mountainfireflower featuring cotton t shirts

[the real world] by mountainfireflower featuring a double breasted wool coat

What is his/her biggest secret?
Brian: His biggest secret is that he isn't as strong as he wishes he could be.
Violet: Her biggest secret is that she's afraid to love. She's afraid to get her heart broken again.

Has he/she ever been in love?
Brian: Nope... not yet. ;) However, he does feel a strange sort of attraction for his friend Avary. This may or may not prove to be love in time.
Violet: She thought she was once, but it only resulted in a broken heart and shattered hopes.

What is his/her comfort food?
Brian: His comfort food is a giant steak with a large tumbler full of Dr. Pepper, a full basket of fries, and a piece of chocolate cake.
Violet: Dark chocolate and a glass of milk.

Does he/she play a musical instrument? If so, what?
Brian: Indeed he does! He plays guitar.
Violet: She knows a little bit of piano, but she mostly prefers to sing.

What colour are his/her eyes? Hair?
Brian: Light brown, blue eyes.
Violet: Dark brown, blue eyes.

Does he/she have any pets?
Brian & Violet: They both own a long-haired collie named Fiona.

What is his/her favorite place to be?
Brian: He loves to take long walks in the forest.
Violet: She prefers to be snuggled up in front of her TV with a pair of slippers and a cup of hot tea.

What are some of his/her dreams or goals?
Brian: He would like to touch people with his music, settle down, and raise a family someday.
Violet: She'd like to survive high school.

Does he/she enjoy sports?
Brian: Heck yeah. He's a diehard football fan.
Violet: Not so much a football fan, but she has a secret addiction to major league tennis.

What is his/her favorite flower or plant?
Brian: He loves oak trees.
Violet: Well, what do you know? She loves violets! :P

I hope you enjoyed reading about Violet and Brian as much as I did - because now I love them all the more. :) And I feel like I know them a lot better, too! It appears as if Beautiful People is doing its job. ;) Toodles!

P.S. - don't forget to submit any questions you can think of to either Georgie or me so that we can use them in upcoming rounds of Beautiful People! Just leave a comment if you think of any. :)

Bombs Away!

2011-08-05T13:59:00.000-07:00

You're the sky that I fell through

And I remember the view whenever I'm holding you

The sun hung from a string

Looking down on the world as it warmed over everything

Chills run down my spine as our fingers intwine

And your sighs harmonize with mine

Unmistakably I can still feel your heart

Beat fast when you dance with me

We got older and I should have known

(Do you feel alive?)

That I'd feel colder when I walk alone

(Oh, but you'll survive)

So I may as well ditch my dismay

(Bombs away... Bombs away...)

Circle me and the needle moves gracefully

Back and forth, if my heart was a compass you'd be North

Risk it all cause I'll catch you if you fall

Wherever you go, if my heart was a house you'd be home

It makes me smile because you said it best

I would clearly feel blessed if the sun rose up from the west

Flower balm perfume, all my clothes smell like you

Cause your favorite shade is navy blue

I walk slowly when I'm on my own

(Do you feel alive?)

Yeah, but frankly I still feel alone

(Oh, but you'll survive)

So I may as well ditch my dismay

(Bombs away... Bombs away...)

Circle me and the needle moves gracefully

Back and forth, if my heart was a compass you'd be North

Risk it all cause I'll catch you if you fall

Wherever you go, if my heart was a house you'd be home

If my heart was a house, you'd be home

Sometimes, God speaks best when there are no words.

Summer

2011-07-29T20:39:00.000-07:00

Dear blog world,

No, I didn't fall off the face of the earth. But, life is full swing, and so is summer. It's extremely hot, which means that now is the time for moving furniture, garage sales, painting rooms, getting your own bedroom, and acquiring fish named Flynn (whose alternate alias is Eugene Fishherbert. Just so you know).

It's also been filled with wasting time, chatting with friends, listening to Owl City, wearing gigantic sunglasses, hanging out with friends, wearing beautiful pink feather earrings, and, as of just tonight, sitting at a table listening to your grandpa tell stories about his life while you doodle on a napkin.

I got a new desk today, which has a piece of glass you can put pictures under. I'm calling it my Inspiration Station. Quotes, pictures, and other items of love will go there for when I sit there to write. I also hung up some hanging lights by my bed. They look like fireflies. "You would not believe your eyes if ten million fireflies lit up the world as I fell asleep..."

I've also been writing away, wondering whether red hair is a recessive gene, and contemplating going and doing the litter box instead of writing a blog post.

Love,

-Kylie

Beautiful People - July/August Edition

2011-07-22T21:42:00.000-07:00

Beautiful People is a little late this year, but better late than never, I always say! :)

If you want to find out more about Beautiful People and what it is, go ahead and head on over to this post.

As always, my partner-in-crime Georgie Penn said it better than I ever could, so I'm just going to quote her on this. For those participating, as you answer the questions, remember, they are not just a way to share what you already know about your character with others, but also to discover more about them yourself. If you don't know the answer to one of the questions, think about it for a little while. Some of the questions are hard, but finding the answer may just help you get to know them a little better.

Last, but not least, even though some of the questions seemed geared towards non-fantasy kind of characters, I still encourage fantasy authors to see if they can adapt the questions so it'll work for them. If you need to change the questions around a little bit, please feel free to do so. You could also imagine what the answer would be if your character wasn't fantasy. What would they be like in a modern world?

Otherwise, on to the questions! Thanks to Hannah Grace and Taylor Lynn for these questions.

What is his/her biggest secret?
Has he/she ever been in love?
What is his/her comfort food?
Does he/she play a musical instrument? If so, what?
What colour are his/her eyes? Hair?
Does he/she have any pets?
What is his/her favorite place to be?
What are some of his/her dreams or goals?
Does he/she enjoy sports?
What is his/her favorite flower or plant?

Also, please leave any and all questions you have for Beautiful People, since we're putting together a master list and you can never have too many questions. ;)

Don't forget to sign the linky!

Have fun! :)

A Tale of Toenails

2011-07-19T21:28:00.000-07:00

(This story took place yesterday, July 18th, 2011, around 6 p.m. It is absolutely, painfully true. It's also a painful memory to recall, and I winced several times while writing this post.)

I pick up my plate and head into the kitchen after a yummy meal cooked by none other than my mother. My brother and my mom respectively are both in the kitchen. That's when disaster happens.

I don't know how it happens, but somehow I trip over my brother's foot. As it happens, I snag my fourth toenail on the top of his foot. This toenail has never grown in right and always sticks out awkwardly, so it's no surprise that I whacked it on something - again. I've done it many times before.

It hurts more than usual, but I don't really notice. I mean, I hit my brother's foot really hard, so why shouldn't it hurt? I return to my duties in the kitchen.

"Who's bleeding?" My mom gasps and points to the tile below my feet.

There is blood on the floor.

Realization hits me. So that's why my foot hurts worse than usual!

My fourth toe is covered in blood. Why? I don't know, only that my brother must have a really hard foot.

Long story short, we wrapped my foot in a rag, then went in to show it to my dad. After a long deliberation, we decided that yes, the toenail was coming off, and yes, we needed to get it taken care of, and no, I did not want to do it at home by ourselves. So we headed off to urgent care. That ended up being an adventure in and of itself...

Stay tuned for part 2.

Blogger Fog And Celtic Tunes

2011-07-11T10:00:00.000-07:00

Aside from my post two days ago, I haven't posted on my blog lately as much as I usually do. You may have noticed. That's because I'm having a fit of blogger fog.

*sigh*

I have tons of ideas to post, and no brainpower/motivation.

So, I decided to post about Irish reels - more specifically, Celtic music in general.

Along with Owl City, this is the current music that I've been fangirling over.

It's fairly often that you can find me going to YouTube, and then going to my favorites. There, I have a whole collection of inspiring, stirring Celtic music.

So, I decided to share it with you.

Enjoy. :D

Seven Wicked Reels by Barrage

I've listened to this song ever since I was younger and my dad was gifted with the Barrage CD (aptly self-titled Barrage). It's so energetic and always reminds me of pirates.

Allen's Bar, also by Barrage

This is where my fandom for Robin Hood comes into play. This song reminds me of Allan A Dale. Always.

Lochaber Badger / Glass of Beer / Trip To Herve's
by Seisiún

I found this on The Director's blog. (Thank you sooo much. :D) They're four very talented guys that like to play Celtic medleys. And I love how they incorporated the guitar into it. Pure genius.

He's a Pirate, by David Garrett

My friend Lonnie shared this link with me once. And though I have only seen the first POTC once, I listen to this on a daily basis. Why? I have no idea. The POTC soundtrack is simply brilliant.

The Blood of Chu Chulainn

This one I found on Malkah's blog, in her Beautiful People post. And despite its slightly weird name, it really is a beautiful song. It reminds me of valiant battles and the calm after the storm, and it makes me want to dance.
Celtique Irish Folk

And last, but not least, this is the song that was stuck in my dream from a couple of days ago - yeah, the one about Queen Elizabeth the I. I listened to this song right before bed and it got stuck in my dreams. And it was on repeat. >.< Other than that, it's a great song! ;)
I'm fully American, but my roots are Celtic. That's my heritage. These songs make me long to visit Scotland and Ireland. Because someday, I will.

Matters of Historical Importance

2011-07-09T19:56:00.000-07:00

I've been reading about the Middle Ages and Renaissance time periods. We're doing a little school over the summer, and one of the subjects I esteem above all the others is history. I've been reading my history book like crazy, and in fact, I finished in this morning.

That's not the point, though. Yesterday, I read all the way from Christopher Columbus to Martin Luther while hanging out with my sister in the basement that afternoon. Then, I climbed into bed at midnight and read some more.

Yes, I'm crazy.

I ended up having dreams about being Queen Elizabeth the I, plots from others who want to steal my throne, paint samples, and Irish jigs that go through my head over and over and over again.

Needless to say, I did not sleep very well.

Anyway, speaking of matters of historical importance...

I GOT MY PROOF COPY FROM CREATESPACE.

Reese's Pieces is now in book form.

Thanks to flambeau, my fellow moderator on NarniaWeb, for making the awesome cover - and thanks to Tina for adding in my author name, even though it's blurred. ;)

Of course, now it needs editing. As in, a major plot face lift. My plot stinks.

But you'll never know what an AMAZING feeling it is to hold your own book in your hands until you actually do it. It makes me feel that yes, I am a writer. And yes, I can do this.

Now, onto the third draft. :P

There Was Another Time

2011-07-04T16:28:00.000-07:00

I know that I've come a long way

My heart's headed in the right place

But sometimes your past's hard to face

But now I know you

I sailed through the high winds and waves

I wondered if I could be saved

But I have emerged unscathed

Because I know you

Before I knew you

Before I could see

That you could take all my troubles from me

Before I knew you

I was so incomplete

There was another time in my life

Before I knew you

Before I knew you
I was incomplete.

-- There Was Another Time In My Life by Relient K

{Happy Independence Day!}

Awkwardly Awesome, Part Two

2011-06-30T21:02:00.000-07:00

Awkward:

1. Earlier tonight, I went with my mom and brother to the grocery store. The air around here has been really smoky because of the recent fire in New Mexico, so my brother and I resolved that we would hold our breath, all the way from the car into the store. It went fine when we walked in. When I was walking out, however, I made a loud, exaggerated motion of holding my breath - puffing out my cheeks, the whole bit. I did this, only to see another teenage girl as soon as I walked around the corner. Yeah. I bet I made a good impression.

2. Last night, I realized that I have a roll of toilet paper in my room and couldn't remember why. (Afterwards, I remembered that I was using it in place of tissues, so don't worry. It's not that awkward.)

3. I accidentally broke a rule in a game on the Narnia forum I moderate... even though I am a moderator and enforce the rules. Don't worry, I do follow the rules... most of the time. I'm only human.

4. At the same grocery store, a country song started playing over the radio, and I randomly started to sing along. (It was "I'll Stand by You", by Carrie Underwood.) My mom looked at me and asked me where on earth I'd heard that song. I still don't know, but somehow, I knew all the lyrics. :P

5. This conversation took place right before we had company this evening:

Mom: Did you brush your hair yet?

Me: I brushed it. Whether I got it to look nice is debatable.

Mom: There's a piece sticking straight up.

Me: I know. I can't get it to go down.

(Thank God for bobby pins.)

Awesome:

1. The new music video for Deer in the Headlights.

2. Thanks to the stormy weather earlier, I got to wear my Converse earlier for the first time this summer.

3. Yesterday, I officially submitted Reese's Pieces to CreateSpace so that I can get my free proof copy. This morning, I got the email that it shipped. I'm so excited! I'll be sure to post pictures when it arrives.

4. I got to eat vanilla ice cream tonight. Life is good.

5. Characters that make me smile. Yes, I have new ones since I last posted. Is that not sad? My brain just does not stop.

6. I got to play Wii sports last night with several of my closest friends. :) It was fun. And yes, I beat them soundly at archery a round or two. ;)

7. God's grace that, even though I lazed around and had a bad headache today, makes me feel like I did something just by being with Him.

8. My awesome friends. :)

9. This picture:

(click here for part one of Awkwardly Awesome.)

I'm The Kind of Girl Who...

2011-06-29T16:38:00.000-07:00

I'm the kind of girl who...
... watches Merlin just so she can see this. (Thanks for inspiring my daily dose of fangirlishness, Lia. ;)